perhapx`_____ lostlove \\

sobbs.

2005-03-23T20:59:00.001-08:00

sobbs. sobbs. sobbs. whadd shouldd ii do noww. SOBBS. iim brokiin downn. sobbs. rrealliii brokiin downn. sobbs. ii rreallii cantt stop cryiinn. sobbs. sobbs. ii apologiisedd tuhh euu. ii saiidd sho manii thiings ttuh euu thruu sms. sobbs. euu jjus repliiedd one sentence. sobbs. do euu nnoee iitt reallii crushhedd mmuh harrtt fehh muiiee tuhh sae BREAK URPP. iitt reallii hurtts. iitt ttook muiie a milliionn tearrs ttuh saidd tat. sobbs. euu saiidd euu ll returnn muuiie da riing. sobbs. fromm datt sentencee. ii niiew. iits da endd ov us. sobbs. no more happiiee tiimes. iits all noww memoriies. sobbs. fadiinn memoriies. sobbs. euu saiidd we are strangerrs fromm noww enn. sobbs. ii durnnoe euu. euu durnnoe muiie. sobbs. totalliiee sttrangerrs. sobbs!!!!!! DEADD. iim deadd fromm noww enn. sobbs. sobbs......

sobbs.

2005-03-23T20:59:00.000-08:00

sighh~!

2005-03-21T09:29:00.000-08:00

hhaiis. tuudae moodd damnn badd. sighh~! msg hiim justt noww. waiitiin fehh vehh long. burdd. hhe diin call muiie orr at leastt rreply. hhaiis. bored x(. calledd carol. foundd outt tat he was tokiin ttuh carol. ii was sadd. sadd. sadd. andd even more sadd. hhaiis. sho diisappoiintedd. ddenn iishh lykke. foundd outt. afterr euu sentt muiie home. wenntt ttuh meett carol deyy all. iit makes muiie feel tat iim a burdenn ttuh euu. ii nnoe. iin da fiirstt placee. euu wanna follow ddemm. burdd. euu hadd ttuh sentt muiie tuhh da interchange fiirstt. hhaiis. rreallii berii sadd. euu scoldd muiie brainless yesterrdaee. ii was damn HURT. durnn euu nnoe sumtymms urr wordds rreallii vehh vehh vehh hurtiin. sobbs. ' braiinless' tiis wordd iishh iindiirectlii ov euu stabiinn a kniife iintuhh mmuh harrtt. hhaiis. ii nnoee ii nnoe euu are vehh fustratedd att tat tiime. hhaiis. ii underrstandd. burdd. jjustt vehh sadd. vehh HURTT. sobbs. godd. whadd shouldd ii do now? sobbs. tiis iishh rreallii a HAPPIIE miiseriie. ii rreallii lurrve hiim alortt. sobbs. rreallii alortt.

=(

2005-03-19T18:49:00.000-08:00

hhaiis. =( tuudae hhe shoutedd at muiie. rreallii wwanna cry at tat tiime. tearrs wanna flow outt lerrs. burdd. ii controlledd. hhaiis. hhe fiind muiie iirritatiin. tho. hhe saiidd shorwiiee lerrs. andd hhe was feeliin vehh fustratedd att tat tiime. burdd. stiil berii sadd. hhaiis. =( sadd. ii rreallii lurrhhffe hiim alortt. more ddenn ii can descriibe. hhaiis. loorviin hiim was suchh a paiin. cos eberiitiime ii gortt da ffearr ov losiin hiim. hhaiis. ii nnoee. nothiin lastt ferreverr. tts why. whadd ii yearnn ferhh iishh long term relatiionshiipps. andd nortt shortt ones. hhaiis. yesterdaee iishh ourr twuu month anniiversariie. hhaiis. iit ishh onlii twuu monthhs. andd wii gortt sho manii probbs lerrs. hhaiis. whadd ll happen ttuh us iin da future? no one nnoes. wii cantt prediictt iitt. hhaiis. why cantt ii jjus thynkk posiitiveliie? ddenn ii wurnn habb sho muchh worriies andd probbs lerrs. hhaiis. hhe eberiitime ssae muiie petty. unreasonable. stubbornn. =( sobbs. eberiitime ii thynnk ov iitt. ii criied. sobbs. am ii tat badd? hhaiis. ii rreallii durnnoe whadd ttuh do. iisiitt characterr clashh? orr lacc ov communiicatiion? ii rreallii durrnnoe. ii wonderr howw long cann ii still holdd enn. hold enn ttuhh tiis happiiee miiisery. we habb gortt goodd andd happiiee tiimes. burdd. badd ones too. hhaiis. iim rreallii feelliin berii miiserable. =( ii cantt tel hiim diirectliie. cos weenn faciin hiim. iim lostt ferhh wordds. hhaiis. sho nowww writiin iin mmuh blog. hope one ddae hhe ll pass y mmuh blog. andd readd tiis entry. hhaiis.
miisery\\-
iiWANnomore tearrs*

ggees. =)

2005-03-16T18:59:00.000-08:00

ggees. toottpidd nehh tuudae. actuallii wanna pon NDP derrs. actualliie we meett siiew ling deyy all at mac at 11. denn wwe all hadd ourr breakfastt. mmuh laogongg. shereenn. wann yii. sook ee. ruiining. andd carol norrs. =) afterr tt iishh lykke dere iishh still anotherr more twuu andd a halff hourr ttuh darhh shittyy NDP. wwe are were lykke stonin dere. sho bored x(. ddenn siiew liing came mmuh hse play wiithh mmuh babiiee sisterr norrs. kkekes. ddenn wwe took 975 all da way ttuhh bukiit panjang plaza. ddenn walkk arounndd dere. boughtt cheeze cake. woot~! *yummiee! kkeke. sho niice. denn wentt tuhh ah sheng's hse. kkeke. urmms. qiichang patriick monkeyy andd ddearddear were all dere. ddenn tttootpidd NDP teacherr go call mmuh parrentts ssae ii nevberr go NDP. ddenn mmuh motherr calledd muiie lortts ob tiimes. ddenn fiinalliie ii piickedd urrpp da ffone. she was lykke screamin overr da ffone. oh godd. mmuh earrs goiin spoill liiaos larrs. ddenn no choiice. ii habb ttuh drag mmuhselff backk ttuh skool. hurrbbiie andd carol accompaniiedd muiie. hhaiis. burddenn actualliie nDp nortt dat badd actualliie. lols. chattedd wibb all da sec 1s. samantha. grace. kim. weii liing norrs. kkeke. andd geraldiine. lol. ddenn beriiberii fasttt 5 plus lerrs. kkeke. ourr instructorr dismissedd us berii earliie. kkeke. nextt weekk we gonna combiine withh palm leaves andd orchidd lerhh worrs! ggees. (^^)Y ddenn afterr tat. boutt ttuh go home lerrs lorrhhs. toottpidd hurrbiie! humphhf! kkiip enn` rreadiin tt stewpiidd comiic. hurrhurrs. tt durnnoe whadd naruto lorhhs. stiil gortt catus andd cat iinsiide dderrs. LOL. took bus wiithh shereenn. sentt herr hhome. cos shhe shiick marhhs. haiiyohh. poorr thiing. shereeenn arhh shereen. mustt takkaiirre worrs. durnn eberiitime worriie ferhh us, sisterrs. haiiyohh. mustt fasterr recoverr kkaes? c euu sho pale. rrealli lykke berii shiick liiddat. =( TAKKAIRRE lortts worhhs.
#iiLOORVEyoo.
-iiffyoowereaskiinmuiie iiff iiniiddeuu,, daanswerriishhFERREBERR.
iicantt liive withoutt yoo hurrbiiee[*.]

sobbs.

2005-03-13T22:39:00.000-08:00

sobbs. whadd ii cann do now iishh onlii cry. sobbs. ii cann do nuthiink burdd cry. ii nnoe. cry wurnn solve anii probbs. burdd. ii CANTT halpee. sobbs. we arentt evernn FRIENDS noww. euu diin evernn gimme da chancee tuhh bbe at leastt urr friiendd. sobbs. da kiind ov expressiiionn euu lookedd att miiee jjuss now rreallii hurtts miiee alortt. sobbs. euu look att miiee wiv tat expressiion tat iim jjus a strangerr ttuhh euu. sobbs. all ii wann iishh tuhh bbe urr friiend. sho siimple. sobbs. how ii wiishh euu can hug miiee. sobbs. a friiend hug ll do. sobbs. ii rreallii rreallii lurrffe euu alortt. sobbs. alortt alortt. sobbs. ii wan yoo. sobbs. burdd. mmuh hartt saes no. mmuh hartt rejectedd. mmuh hartt saes goodbye. sobbs. burdd. ii rreallii cantt lett go. sobbs. ii cantt facee darhh realitiie ob euu LEAVIIN miiee once more. sobbs. burdd. iim gettiin closerr andd closerr tuhh da factt. ii canntt hang enn aniimore. mmuh hartt iishh dyiinn. iim collapsiinn.

hhaiis.

2005-03-12T10:37:00.000-08:00

sobbs. ii cantt controlledd mmuh tearrs anymoree. sobbs. actiinn fiine infrontt ov eberiione iishh sho diificultt. sobbs. ii habb tuhh actt lykke nuthiink has happenedd iin da fiirstt place. sobbs. wenn can ii stop all these actiings? sobbs. mmuh worldd iishh breakiin intuhh twuu partts as dayys goes by. sobbs. harrtt iishh shatteriinn iintuh more n more piieces eachh daee. weeps. euu saiidd FRIENDS. burdd. euu diin evern wann tuhh bbe friiends wivv miiee. ii was lykke sho thiick skinnedd. kipp tokiin tuhh ya enn msn. andd yurre onlii replyy iishh `ok`. sobbs. we arentt even friendds now. sobbs. evernn iiff euu durnn lykke miiee aniimore. ii jjus wan tuhh bbe a simple friiend ov us. nothiin less. nothiin more. sobbs. burdd. euu diin even gave miiee da chance tuhh. sobbs. enn da ffone. bothh ov us iishh lykke sho siilence. onlii sillence couldd bbe heardd. sobbs. ii rreallii feltt lykke cryiin att tt tymme. sobbs. ii controlledd. sobbs. tearrs was welliin urrpp iin mmuh eyes. sobbs. da nextt momentt wen euu were awayy. sobbs. tearrs iimmediately flew downn mmuh cheekks. sobbs. wivv no one tuh console miiee. sobbs. no one tuhh lendd miiee a shoulderr. no one tuhh pass miiee a tiissue. sobbs. a miiliion wordds wurnn briing euu backk. ii noee. cos ii habb triiedd. neitherr a milliion tearrs wouldd. cos ii habb criied. sobbs.
GOODBYEiishhda hardestt wordd ob all. especialliiee tuhh a personn hu meantt da worldd tuhh miiee.
walkinALONEiin da raiin.

x.` har rtt .x

sobbs.

2005-03-11T13:10:00.000-08:00

sobbs. we aree overr. sobbs. now iit iish reall. rreallii overr. sobbs. utterliiee disappointedd iin euu. sobbs. ferreberr iishh gone. sho do eterniityy. deres no us anymore. sobbs. ii can no longerr c urr fiingerr interlockiin wibb miine now. sobbs. all gone. euu were once miine. now. nortt. sobbs. iim leftt withh shatteredd piieces ov brokenn harrtt. sobbs. andd happiiee memoriies. sobbs. tiiss iishh all ii leftt. sobbs. da onlii thiings ii can kiipp iin mmuh harrtt. sobbs. ourr love gone. eberiithiing gone. no longerr mine. sobbs. eberiithiing iishh juus a dreamm. 52th daee. sobbs. eberiithiiing endd sho quiickiie. euu saiidd euu ll hate miiee ferreberr. sobbs. ii ll rmb. sobbs. now deres onlii hatredd between us. sobbs. *ii hate yoo* tiis wordd iishh alreadii enuff tuhh breakk urrpp all darhh piieces ob mmuh brokenn hartt whiichh iishh alreadii shatteredd longlong ago. euu mendd iitt til halff way denn breakk iitt once more. why. why are euu sho cruel? sobbs. whadd ii can onlii sae now iishh. * ii love yoo...

=)

2005-03-11T12:33:00.000-08:00

hhaiis. whadd m ii gonna do now. sobbs. iim lurrviin euu more n more eachh secondd. andd rreallii rreallii berii afraiid ov losiinn euu. sobbs. euu kiipp teliin miiee euu wurnn leave miiee. ii nnoe. burdd. da fearr jjus refusedd tuh go awaee. sobbs. ii do trustt euu. iitt iishh becoz ii trustt euu too muchh. ii putt mmuh whole trustt iin euu. dats why da ffearr iishh backk. sobbs. ii rrealli durnn wiishh datt historyy wouldd repeatt iitselff. datt hiistoriiee hiidenn deep insiide mmuh harrtt. tt piiece ov memoryy datt ii don wiishh tuhh even recall abiitt. nortt even a lil. sobbs. ii hate da pastt. da pastt wenn ii was leftt abandonedd. no one tuuh halpee miiee. sobbs. ii was leftt tuhh piickk urrpp all da shatteredd piieces ob mmuh brokenn hartt mmuhselff. sobbs. watchhiin urr shadow fadiin iin muiiee. sobs. now. euu are backk agaiin. wivhh all darhh promiises andd loorvee. noww mmuh loorvee ferr euu iishh sho strongg tt iim suffocattiin. sobs. am ii geetiin overr possesiive? sobbs. iim rreallii rrealli afraiidd ob losiin euu once more tiime. sobbs.

haiis.

2005-03-10T21:49:00.000-08:00

urmms. tuudae baddbadd ddae. =( iin da morniin quarrelledd wivhh ddearr. hhaiis. afterr datt ii stiil scoldd hiim kaobeii. hhaiis. sobbs. rrealli shorwiiee laogong. hhaiis. iim too unreasonnable liiaos. itt iishh all mmuh faultt. hhaiis. sobbs. iim rreallii nortt a goodd steadd. hhaiis. bburrdenn afterr datt miiee n laogong okaes liiaos. ddear wentt home before datt. cos hhe nortt feeliinn well marrs. hhaiis. denn afterr skool. wentt outt wiv teck guang andd qiing. ddearr meett us at bugiis afterr datt. followedd by carol and wanyii afterr datt. kkeke. boughtt zhuzhu's burffdaee presentt. kkeke. denn afterr datt. we aree broke. actualiii beferr datt miiee alreadii broke liiaos larhhs. kkeke. dden all ob us were lykke damnn hugriiee. andd ddearr onlii leftt 10 buckks plus. lol. we took hiis moneyy andd wentt tuuh habb burgerr kiing. oh godd. can euu imagiine 5 ppl shariinn a lill biitt ob foodd. lol. afterr datt. iitt was lykke. iim sho hugriiee. haiiyohh. ruushh home afterr datt wivv ddearddear sendiin miie tuhh da lRt statiion. gees. (^-'*)Y sho datts aboutt all ferhh tuudae. kkeke. yawnns. waiitiin ferhh ddear's msg. guess he iishh stiil iin da hospital now barrs. kkeke. hiis auntt jjus gave birthh tuhh a baby gurrll. lol. darhh fiirstt baby gurll iin hiis generatiion. lol. congratts hubbiiee! x) ggees.
signiin obb!
ha r rtt #

boredd x(

2005-03-08T21:36:00.000-08:00

hehe. tuudae accompaniie qiing andd ddearr tuhh habb a haiir cutt. chunyang came along too. we took taxii tuhh bukiitt tiimah. denn wentt tuhh da salon monsoonn. miiee andd chunyangg standd downn ddere waiitiin ferhh qiing andd laogong tuhh fiinish theiirr hair cut. qiing was sho cute aftterr darhh haiir cutt. laogongg aso beriiberii CUTE. lol. look more n more shuaii lerrs. hiis haiirr now berii style. lol. niice hair cutt nehh ddear. kkeke. hhe kiipp sayiin berii ugwiiee. haiiyohh. wherr gortt. hees. sho niice. =p
andd horhhs. ddearr. ii ll lurrbbffe yoo no matterr whadd dderrs. donn alwiiees thiink ii don lykke euu nehhs. ii ll neberr eberr abandon euu dderrs no matterr whadd. ii ll bbe yuure laopo yii beii zii dderrs. ourr fiingerrs ll bbe interlockedd withh eachh otherr ferreberr. jjus lykke ourr harrtt. gees. no matterr whadd. ii ll definately stiickk tuhh euu dderrs. kkeke. ii don karee. gees. totpidd laogongg. mmuh rring confiiscated he ssae he wann halpe miiee take backk. buddernn hhe nevberr. hhaiis. nvm. tmlo ii go take backk mmuhselff. hhaiis. nowadays feltt sho uneasy withoutt mmuh baobeii riing. =( hhaiis. nvm la. gees. andd horhhs. huubiiee. ii swearr. euu are ferreberr iin mmuh harrtt. ddarhh fiirstt one. nortt tuhh be replace by anyonee else. ii promiisedd. tiis promiise iishh ferreberr a promiise made deepp iin mmuh harrtt. tiis promiise ll neberr bbe brokenn. =)

siighh!

2005-03-07T19:55:00.000-08:00

hhaiis. rreallii gortt da feelliin tat we aree driftiin furtherr andd furtherr apartt. apartt from eachh otherr. ourr harrtts arre no longerr togetherr. hhaiis. rreallii durrnnoee why ii gortt diis feelliin. hhaiis. triied tuhh msg euu. burdd euu diin reply. hhaiis. ii can no longerr c ferreberr iin yurre eyes. ii longedd ferhh tat kiindd ob expressiion euu usedd tuhhh look iintuh mmuh eyes iin da pastt. now iit iish all gone. neberr backk agaiin. sighh. euu no longerr treatt miiee as goodd as beferr. ii hope iim too sensiitive. burrd. ii guess iim wrong. tat feelliin tat euu habb ferhh miiee iishh no longerr dere. ii feltt sho emptiie andd lostt. sobbs. feltt sho lonely. euu abandonedd miiee tuhh a worldd ob miiee alone. all by mmuhselff. walkiin downn da darkk streett all alone. wiithh no one by mmuh siide. oftenn,, ii feltt sho lonely. ii lookedd at da spaces bettween mmuh fingerrs,, andd rememberred tattt,, euu usedd tuhh lock yuuree fiingerrs withh miine iin da pastt. hhaiis. burdd. noww? no more. hhaiis. ii cantt seems tuhh feel da warmthh anymore. iim siinkiin deeperr andd deeperr. feltt sho coldd. ddeep iinsiide mmuh harrtt. hhaiis. euu wurnn nnoee how emptiie ii feel. how abandonedd ii feel. how lostt ii feel. sobbs*- pleasee cann euu lurrbbfee miiee lykkee euu usedd tuhh iin da pastt?

lyrriics meaningful.

2005-03-06T15:27:00.000-08:00

\wang yuann jiing kann bu jjiian nii
/nii de xiin feii quu na lii
\wu sheng feii xiing
/xiiang shou heii ye de jiing mii
\biiee shuo duii bu qii
/biie rang wo shang lerr xiing caii shuo
\bu shii gu yii
/wo que wu fa guaii nii
\biie shuo duii bu qii
/biie rang wo de aii qiing
\biian cheng liian jiia wu piing
/wo que zhii neng aii nii
\bii shang yann jjing que kan jiian nii
/xiiang nii de hao taii tii wu lii
\wo xiiang xiin nii
/que kaii shii bu xiin renn zii ji
\biiee shou duii bu qii
/biiee rang wo huii lerr xiing
\caii shuo bu shii gu yii
/wo que wu fa guaii nii
\biie shuo duii bu qii
/biiee rang wo de aii qiing
\biian cheng xiiao xiin yii yii
/wo que zhii neng aii
\yong xiing dong laii zheng miing
/nii de jjue xiin
\bu yao shuo shuo err yii
/wo xiiang yao de bu zhii shii *shorwiee

hhaiis.

2005-03-06T00:40:00.000-08:00

hhaiis. tuudaee fiirstt aiid com nehh. we lostt. hhaiis. afterr losiinn stiil habb tuhh lett some ppl scoldd. eberitiime ssae we gibb attitude. euu urrselff aso giib attitude. idiott. hhaiis. dden afterr tt. wenn all ob us nnoe darhh resultts. we wantedd tuhh cry iin darhh hall. budd. dere were too manii ppl iin darhh hall lerrs. we quiickliie gett outt ob darhh hall. hhaiis. all ob us wentt tuhh a cornerr andd criied. sobbs. afterr all darhh cryiins. we huggedd tugetherr. andd cheer eachh otherr urrpp. hhaiis. dden afterr tt. wentt tuhh habb ourr verrverr late diinerr. sheena wentt home wiithh samanthaa. hhaiis. carol andd huiyu gortt no appetite at all. bothh ob dem look sho gloomiie. hhaiis. afterr tt. meett gordonn norrs. kkeke. mmuh ddearriiee sho goodd. come all darhh way tuhh bugiis tuhh look ferhh mmiiee. denn sendd miiee home. gees. denn reachedd home boutt 12.15am liiddat. denn now bloggiin. kkeke. hadd a berii berii slightt quarrel withh laogongg jjus now. sho sadd. buddernn now we okaee liiaos. hees.
ii lurrffee darhh onii hiim iin mmuhh harrtt-

(=

2005-02-09T00:52:00.000-08:00

hee. ii fiinallii gortt muhh answerr. keke. iin darhh pastt. dere aree sho manii doubtts deepp iin muhh hartt. now. deyy aree gone. ferreberr gone. yuuree answerr has alreadii answeredd a thousandd doubtts iin muhh harrtt. keke. muhh replyy tuhh euu ishh. yeshh. ii stiil wann tuhh holdd on. wanna holdd on ferreberr no matterr whadd happenns. (=
hao aiii niii worhhs. yesterdaee niightt. ii thoughtt thruu darhh wholee niittee. luckiiliiee ii diin lett go. orelsee. now ii ll be feelliinn damn terrible. andd regretful...
zhen de hao zhenn xii nii worhhs. feelliin sho xiing FU noww! keke.
darhh bestt thiing ishh ii habbvvee gortt yoo. habvviin euu ishh darhh bestt thiing iin muhh liifwe. euu aree muhh happiiness. andd ii ll grabb holdd ob muhh happiness ferrberr andd neberr everr lett go. hee. ourr lurbbvee storyy ll habbvee no endiin. it ll go en ferreberr n everr......

iiff.

2005-02-07T02:09:00.000-08:00

'laogongg. wo aii nii. zhen derhh hao aii nii worhhs. haii. suddennlii feel lykkee cryiinn. =( sumtyms. iiim reallii hurtt `z by darhh wayy euu neglectedd miiee. darhh way euu hackk karee miiee. sobb. sumtyms. ii reallii feel lykkee cryiin ob euu. budd. ii diin. ii reallii carntt control andd stop muhh tearrs from flowiin outt. sobb. wo zhen derhh hao xiiang hao xiiang ku worhh. sobb. muhh harrtt ishh cryiin. muhh harrtt ishh all floodedd withh tearrs. sobb. itz gonna overflow sum otherr daees. andd ii reallii donno how tuhh cope withh iitt. ii carrntt standd iitt anymore. sobbs. darkkness andd loneliiness ishh muhh onii friiendd. andd paiin has alreadii became partt ob muhh liife. paiin ishh darhh onii thiing ii habbvee beenn goiin thruu everydae. ii reallii wiishh ii cann liive ferhh myselff. awayy froomm darhh worldd. muhh friiendds. everyone. ii don wanna briing dem paiin anymore. especiiallii yoo. ii habbvee beenn giiviin euu paiin ` hurtt ` saddness ` unhappiness siincee darhh verr fiirstt daee we steadd. sobb. reallii feltt sho damn guiilty. ii made euu sarcrifii ferhh miiee sho muchh. ii reallii hope ii can saee shorwiiee tuhh euu facee tuhh facee iifhh ii habbvee darhh chancee. ii noee. im yurre worstt steadd. muhh lurrbvee ferrhh euu bringgs euu paiin. ourr relatiionshiip gibvees euu hurtt. dearr. ii reallii donchh wiishh tuhh hurtt euu anymoree. sobb. dearr. wo aii nii hao duo hao duo. sobbs. reallii donchh wiishh tuhh lett go ob euu. wanna hugg euu tite andd tel euu ii reallii lurrbvees yoo. ii reallii do. sobbs. budd. ii kiipp giiviin euu paiin. andd ii donchh wiishh tuhh gibb euu paiin anymoree. no moree paiin. ii ratherr be darhh badd personn. be darhh harrttbreakkeerr. ii also donchh wishh tuhh c euu sadd. c euu hurtt. sobbs. iim realli badd. iim badd tuhh darhh core. ii sux sho muchh. ii hatee myselff. sobb. whyy m ii alwayys be darhh one giivinn euu hurtt? sobb. ii hattee darhh presentt miiee. sobbs. ii hatee doiin things ii donchh lykke. budd whadd ii do? sobbs. ii hadd tuhh do tiis. sobbs. ii hadd tuhh breakk yurree hartt. sobbs. ii reallii DONWANN! ii wannaa be wivhh euu ferrberr. tiil darhh endd of darhh tymme. sobbs. ii wann tuhh spendd muhnh every minutee every secondd wivhh euu. tiil muhh ver lastt breathee. sobbs. im sho confusedd! shouldd ii or nortt? sobbs. whadd iim suree now ishh ii reallii lurrbee euu alortt. sobbs. damn lortts. iin muhh hartt euu are muhh everythiing. muhh worldd. nathiin ishh more importantt denn euu. sobb. euu lertt miiee hadd darhh reasonn tuhh smille. euu lertt miiee feltt tt im speciial. euu lett miiee feel sho blessedd. sobbs. datt aree sho manii reasonns ii doncch wishh tuhh lett yoo go. andd darhh mostt importantt ishh. ii reallii lurrbvee yoo. ii donno how tuhh express myselff tuhh lertt yoo noe how muchh ii lurrbvee yoo. how muchh ii karee boutt yoo. how muchh ii cherishh euu. how impt euu are tuhh miiee. sobbs. ii ratherr be darhh one hu ishh hurtt andd nortt euu. dearr. wo zhen derhh hen aii nii. hen aii hen aii. sobbs.

breakkiin down soonn.

2005-02-02T20:12:00.000-08:00

oh godd. haii. deyy aree controlliin miiee. whadd am ii tuhh dem?
a maiidd or whadd?
haii. sobbs. breakiin downn lerhh larhhs.
deyy don giibb miiee freedomm.
ii wann freedom!!
im alreadii 15.
ii cann takkaiiree ob mahhselff.
IM NORTT A KIDD.
whyy do deyy treatt miiee lykke im a 3 yearr old kidd?
deyy habbvee tuhh deciide everythiing ferhh miiee.
whyy carntt ii make muhh own decisionns!

WHY!
ii wann tuhh habb mahh ownn opiniion.
mahh own viiews.
canntt deyy stopp controllliin miiee?
ii am oldd enuff tuhh noee whadd m ii doiin.
ii reallii noees.....
pleasee.....
stop controlliin miiee......
ii wann tuhh be myselff......
sobbs.
breakk down......

how ii wishh euu aree withh miiee noww.
dearr. miiee reallii verr sadd. sobbs.
ii niiidd euu.
sobbs.

sadd.

2005-01-29T15:55:00.000-08:00

sighh. saddsaddsadd. donno whyy. suddennly sho sadd. ii understandd i may nortt be darhh bestt gurll iin darhh whole wiidee worldd. andd definatelyy nortt iin darhh futuree too. sighh* andd mostt probablyy. ii may nortt even be darhh dreamgurll iin yurre harrtt. sighh. buddenn onee thiingg i noee ishh. ii reallii lurrbbee yoo alortt. lurrbee yoo till ii wannaa suffocatee liiaos. reallii cheriishh euu loadds andd loadds `z. sho affraiidd tuhh lose euu. donno whyy. ii hate mahhselff. ii hatee muhh harrtt. ii hate darhh wayy muhh harrtt thinkks. ii don wann tuhh thinkk tiis way! ii kipp thiinkiin datt whadd ll liife be iiff euu disappearr. denn ii aso donn wanna liivee liiaos. withhoutt euu = no miiee. no euu = endd ob muhh liife. sighh! hao aii nii worhhs. >.< ii reallii wann tuhh noee how l-o-n-g ll ourr ferreverr lastt? ii reallii hope ii can fastt forwhadd time andd c iif dere ishh any futuree ferhh us. * ferreverr doesntt lastt* tiis three worrdds keep flasshiin thru mahh miindd. mahh hartt. haii. ii donwann all tis. sadd. ii wann yii beii zii. ferreberr iishh nortt enuff ferhh miiee. ii wann eternityy. andd cann euu giimee tt. ii trustt yoo.

hees.

2005-01-21T21:11:00.000-08:00

hee. lurrbvvee euu sho muchh dearr. euu saee mus yii beii zii derhh horhhs. don breakk urr promisee //- kekee. reallii lurrbvee yarhh alorrtt. keke. dearr. mahh alortt ishh alortt alortt. hahas. hm. euu mus believe miiee horhhs. mus habbvee confidencee in miiee. miie reallii nathiin wiithh hiim kkiiee. kekee. in mahh harrtt. deres onii a singlee euu narhhs. euu cann neberr be replacee. euu alwaess saee. euu ll lurrbbvvee miiee til darhh daee i no longerr nidd euu. andd no longerr lykkee euu. now. i tel euu. ii ll lurrbvvee euu til darhh endd ob darhh tymme.
keke. miiee verr thiickk skinnedd derhh narhhs. =x keke. aii nii yii beii zii. wenn ii saee fereberr. datt reallii means fereberr. as long as euu believee in ferreberr. we ll lastt ferreberr.

sobb.

2005-01-18T22:13:00.000-08:00

sobbs.
wo hao nan guo arhhs.
ii tott tuudaee ishh darhh heerrpiiestt daee ob mahh lifee.
budd. ALL TIS HAPPENED!
darhh worstt thiing happenedd. sobbs.
darhh secondd tymme.
im reallii hurtt.
HURTT!

sobbs

2005-01-17T03:49:00.000-08:00

ii
hatee
brokenn
promises!

^^

2005-01-16T16:04:00.000-08:00

woott~! jus came back fromm lott1.
miiee and carol wentt tuhh supporrtt gordonn andd chunyangg darhh donno wadd competitiion.
hees. we votedd 4 votes ferhh dem. lol.
denn damn siian lorhhs. haii.
darhh ttootpidd zhijiiee alwaess li siiao derhh. go take awayy mahh hp.
miiee askk hiim tuu returnn miie til ii wanna diiee liiaos.
hahass. denn keep hangiin aroundd at lott1 datt boriiin placee withh wee leongg deyy all norhhs.
hahass. zhijiiee goiin tuu move house lerhh worhhs. oh godd. he gortt 3 box full errff jay chou's thinggs. he reallii pro man.
afarhh tt. miiee andd carol wentt tuu take neopriintt. hees.
actuallii thee photos shouldd bee verr niice derhh.
buddenn horhhs. tootpidd wee leong viictorr larhhs. come iin liisiiao
hidd behindd darhh curtaiinn.
denn keep poiintiin middle fingerr. twistt//`
now horhhs.almostt all erff mahh neopriintt gortt middlee fingerr lerhh worhhs.
hahass. tootpidd wee leongg. humph. >.<
haii. denn wentt home lorhhs. darnn boredd now. oh godd.
dyiin errff boreddness liiaos. haii.

*missingg euu -

haii.

2005-01-15T21:36:00.000-08:00

haii. im sadd.
ii lurrbvvee a guyy ferhh 6 months liiaos nehhs. haii.
iin mahh harrtt. ii truelyy noes tt dere wunn be anyy endiin betwweenn us.
buudd. im stil hangiin on. i reallii donno whyy m i hangin on ferhh sho long?
sumtyms. ii ll askk maselff. wadd m i waiitiin ferhh actuallii?
no endiin. nathiin ll happen. haii.
tiis faiiriitale harrbvve no endiin.
budd. can i saee. tiis faiirriitale habbvee neberr startt beferr.
haii. loviin darhh onii euu in mahh harrtt.
whiichh no one cann replacee.
buuddenn wenn euu feels datt nobodii lovees euu in tis world.
andd nobodii kares ferhh euu.
euu can stil thiink tt in tiis bigbigg worldd.
deres stil a gurll in sumwherr.
thinkiin ef euu. prayiin ferhh euu.
datt euu ll be heerrpiiee alwaes. (=
in darhh miidlee ef darhh nightt. i ll alwaees stayy urpp awakke tuhh thiink ef euu.
thiinkk til im tiredd. wanna fall asleepp.
andd ii alwaess saww euu in mahh dreams.
iif i cann onii be withh euu in mahh dreamms.
denn ii ratherr sleepp ferreber.
neberr wakee urrpp. andd be wiithh euu ferreberr.
til darhh endd eff darhh tymme. endd ef mahh liffwee.
cos i lurrbvvee euu.
darhh reassoonn ishh euu.
*6 months \\-

farkk!

2005-01-14T21:41:00.000-08:00

wah laoz. damnn farkk urrpp now lorhhs. kaOz. do everythiing aso suayy! actuallii tuudaee wanna go watchh muvee withh huiyu n carol. we wantedd watchh chuckyy. buddenn dahrh toottpidd fatass auntiie don lett us go iin. kaOz. denn we tryy tuhh buy tickett ferhh anotherr show. denn sneak in tuu watchh chuckyy show. buddenn in darhh endd. we gortt caughtt. farkk siia. darhh toottpidd charcoal dere kao beii kao bu. lykke we owe herr liddatt. chee byee. den we watchh dartt donno wadd tootpidd idiotifiiedd disgustiin show ferhh 1 hourr den we leftt liiaos. damn siian siia tt show. denn we wentt backk skool lorhhs. accompanii yuu finddd summone. denn we mett gordonn. andd we accompanii hiim go maC eatt lorhhs. andd denn oh godd. saw our seniorrs. deyy cal askk go outtsidee mac tok lorhhs. saw wanna tokk tuhh us. haii. askiin whyy we neberr go all tt stuffs. denn gordonn come lorhhs. withh bball boiis. oh godd. deyy startedd yelliin and scoldiin eachh otherr. oh godd. haii. denn gordonn keep sayiin mahh seniorrs fatass waddeverr. hee. *goodd jobb gordonn^ lol. denn ourr seniorrs starteddd caliin ourr parentts all tt stuffs. neberr go ssaint john one tymme. cal parents? oh godd. wadd ishh tiis worldd comiin tuhh. chee bye lorhhs. dey demselves neberr pon sJ beferrr harhhs. na beii! cal parentts. cal larhhs. scaredd arhhs. farkkerrs. cal cal cal lorhhs. CHEE BYEE. denn horhhs. keep askiin ferhh parentts no. miie ferrgortt mahh mommiie de marhhs. den one ef mahh seniors scoldd miie andd yell infrontt ef miie. na beii! miie criedd lorhhs. haii. denn things became worse. soonerr. everybodii. all boiis crodiin outtsiddee mac. sho manii siia. denn gordonn tingyangg keng boon dere shoutt shoutt. haii. sho manii ppl dere siia. donno how tuhh descriibe darhh situatiion dere. on darhh thoughtt ef deyy calliin mahh parentts. denn gonna gett scoldedd. miie criedd agaiin. hahass. viictorr denn makiin miie luff lorhhs. ah boon aso. haii. donno larhhs. farkk urrpp daee. denn loadds ob things happenedd. haii. donwanna saee. den zhijiee aso dere lorhhs. soon. everybodii dispersedd. we wentt tuhh darhh bbal courtt. denn tokk tokk withh zhiijiee wee leong ah boon tingyangg gordonn deyy all lorhhs. haii. tootpidd wee leongg. accidentallii throw dahrh bbal at miie. oh godd. *ouchh sho paiin nehhs. mahh headd damn dizzzyy datt tymme. denn wahh c watchh. 7 pluspluss liaos. fasterr wanna go home. buddenn loiteredd at darhh bus stop withh zhijiee deyy all. keep calliin us go voiid deckk tokk. buddenn habbe tuhh go home marhhs. denn afarrhh datt we wentt home lorhhs. oh godd. i reachhedd home boutt 8 plus liddatt. hahass. luckilyy parentts diin sae anythingg. wah laos. den afarrhh datt quareel withh mommiiee. haii. farkk urrpp daee tuudaee. chhee byee siia. haii. farkk urrp dae. farkk urrpp seniors. farkk urrpp cca. kaOz.

farkk!

2005-01-14T05:18:00.000-08:00

2005-01-11T09:21:00.000-08:00

tiis ishh a phrasee copiiedd down from friiendsterr. wooh~!
reallii verr meaningful nehhs``

*no matterr wadd happenedd andd wadd happens.
at leastt at tis momentt.
im withh euu.
andd onee thing ferhh suree datt euu aree darhh one ii lurrbvve now.
andd darhh one ii lovee darhh mostt now.
evennn if it changedd somedayy orr somehoww.
at leastt ferhh now. euu aree by mahh siidee.
andd darhh lurrbee we sharedd ishh ttrue.*

sobbs.

2005-01-09T09:48:00.000-08:00

sobbs. sobbs. sobbs. mahh lil cousiin jus toldd miie datt hiis brotherr ranaway from home. and he ishh missingg now. sobbs. sobbs. im reallii verr worriedd ferhh hiim. sobbs. he ishh mahh closestt cousiin. sobbs. in darhh pastt we gett along verr well. i ll tel hiim all mahh secrets andd thiings. andd he ll tel miie hiis too. we wentt tuhh tuiitiion tuugetherr. he sentt miie home aftarhh tt. sobbs. buddenn now. hes gone. he liedd tuhh mahh auntt datt he gortt tuiition budden actuallii don habbve. sobbs. miie reallii verr worryy noww. sobbs. donno wherr ishh he. andd donno ll anythiing happens tuhh hiim. sobbs. wadd if he neberr comes backk anymore? SOBBS. no! i donwann tiis! sobbs. sobbs. sobbs. he din bringg his hP along. datt means datt he donwanns anybodii tuhh contact hiim. sobbs. sobbs!! he ishh missingg from yesterdae til now liao nehhs. sobbs. my auntt habbvee alreadii wentt tuhh darhh police station andd reportt lerhh. sobbs. sobbs.
prayiin tuhh godd thatt euu ll come backk safe andd soundd.
sobbs. euu mus come backk horhhs. sobbs. pls come backk!!
sobbs. mus rmbb darhh promisee euu madee tuhh miie. euu cannortt ferrgett!!!!!!

ST.JOHNN SUX

2005-01-04T21:54:00.000-08:00

saiintt johnn sux! sux tuhh darhh coree. oh godd. tuudaee we gortt orientatiion norhhs. denn we aree releaseedd earlliie. tuhh changedd tuhh full u. buddenn we aree latee. den everythiingg ishh delayedd. denn aftarhh paradee. we gortt scoldedd lorhhs. haii. denn do pumpiinn ferhh ourr attiiree. attiiree. waddeverr. farkk nehhs~! denn ferhh eff us saee nPcc suxx marhhs. denn dartt idiotifiedd guyy come tel a sJ bitchh. den sJ bitchh go tel seniorr lorhhs. wah kaOz. denn we gortt scoldedd byy seniorr. deyy wan us tuhh apologisee tuhh dartt idiotiifiiedd suckerr. oh no! wan us apologise? fat hope! go n diee lorhhs. kaOz. denn we donwann tuhh ans ourr seniorrs marhhs. deyy tel us gett lostt. andd gett outt ef theirr sightt nehh! haii. den all ef us go apologisee tuhh datt farkerr. i diaoz hiim. wha kaOz. damnn farkk urpp now! dartt bitchh. chee byee kiia. oops =x sorwiie. shee don habbvee chee bye. hee. fark lorhhs she. na beii! hackk karee herr larhhs. seniorrs stil scoldd us andd blame us ferhh nortt respectiin dem. wahh laOz. WADDS DARHH POINTT EF RESPECTIING HERR WEN SHE NEBERR RESPECT US! FARK SIIA.

("V")

2005-01-04T06:27:00.000-08:00

hahass.

2004-12-27T19:51:00.000-08:00

hahass. noww den foundd outt datt i dinn blogg ferhh 10 dayys plusplus? mahh godd. hahass.
hee. mahh new baby sis ishh bornedd. hahass. buddenn she stil habe tuhh stayy in hospitall ferrh bout 20 daes? cos she too small. haiis. nvm larhhs. hee. shee berii cutee nehhs. jus lykke miee. hahass. (= no larhh. if she lykke miee den die lerhh. lols. mummiee aso cumme home lerhh. hee. noww miee maplee level 26 lerhh! woohh~ sho proo horhhs. LoL. kakas.
haiis. goiin tuhh be a new yearr soonn. skoo goiin tuhh reopenn verrverr soon liaox. haiis. don wanna go skool andd facee al thosee disgustiin bookss. andd idiotic teacherrs. haiis. andd summe ef darhh disgustiin classmatess. ekkss~! no choiice. haiis.
hahass. jus foundd outt datt qichangg gortt neww personn in mindd? tis ishh mahh biggestt projectt noww. cos mayb he lykkees.
******
hee. mahh darrliin jiee meii. kakass. donno nehhs. stil haven confirmm. hahass.
haiis. siiian. skool reopenn cannortt plae maplee lerhh. haiis. denn noww sho manii saiint john thinggs tuhh do. even moree siian! haiis. i wann maplee!!! i wann i wann!! haiis. nvmm larhhs. itx jus a gamee marhhs. hee.
haiis. gortt sickk n moree sickk ef saintt johnn lerhh. haiis. wadd happenedd? hatee saiint johnn sho muchh. darhh momentt i noe gortt saint john activitiies next daee. miee ishh siiann untill donno wadd. saiint johnn ishh gettin morre farkk urpp nowadayys. hate everythingg. exceptt ferhh mahh dearr juniorrs andd fwivee jie meiix. haiss. I HATE IT!! disgustiin cca. haiis. don tokk boutt saint johnn lerhh. noww damn FARKK UP.

sobbs.

2004-12-20T12:43:00.000-08:00

sobbs. sobbs. =( sobbs. am i reallie datt badd. sobbs. habb i changedd alott? sobbs. !!! miee selffishh mehh? sobbs. sobbs. im NORTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sobbs. sobbs. im nortt. am i datt badd. sobbs. badd until. sobbs. FARKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FARK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! KAOBEII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sobbs. SOBBS. SOBB!!

'-'

2004-12-16T09:22:00.000-08:00

hm. miee noww feeliin muchh better lerhh. (= i habb learntt howw tuhh lett go ef sum thinggs tt doesntt belonggs tuhh miee. hais.
hee. aniwaee. i buyiin neww hp lerhh. kakas. =p sho happiee. miee donwann tuhh use tis tootpidd hp anymorr. hee. buddenn verr surprise lorhh. miee lostt ma hp 2 tymmes lerhh. ma mummiee daree tuhh lett miee buyy darr fourthh hp. =/ lols.
sho siann. lata habb tuhh go saint john. den noww waitiin ferr ma tuitiion teacherr tuhh cumme. cos i habb tuitiion lata. hais. miee neberr du darr homeworkk. =x lata confirm gett whackk byy herr. hee. aiyohhx. buddenn miee realli donno howw tuhh do marhhs. maths nehh. darr mostt idioticc andd disgustiin subjectt. hais. darr momentt i c darr tootpidd textbook. i wanna orhhorhh lerhh. **yawn** hais. anotherr morr 5 mins. she ll cumme lerhh. cannortt writee lerhh. hee. x^-'x

=(

2004-12-15T19:51:00.000-08:00

hais. i triedd tuhh erasee muhh thoughtts boutt euu. budd i jus cant. sobbs. u took ma alreadii brokennharrtt andd brokee it once agaiin. intuhh millioon andd billiion piecees. sobbs.
[#] x. hidden tearrs behindd a smile ] ]* hais. on darr outtsidee im smiliin. in darr insidee. im cryyiin. sobbs. hais. i donwan al tis!!!!!!!!!!!

sobbs!!

2004-12-14T19:55:00.000-08:00

i hadd enuff ef tis. sobbs. ENUFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sobbs. whyy mus euu treatt miee liddartt. tis ishh nortt darr firstt tymme lerhh. sobbs. i alreadii kneww it. i realli knew it. tts whyy i toldd euu we ll nortt stayy longg. sobbs. budd wadd did euu toldd miee? bet euu forgett lerhh. sobbs. whyy mus euu saee euu love miee wen euu neverr even lykke miee before!!!!!!!!! ahhhhhhhhh!!!!!!! i goinn tuhh collapsee lerhh. cannortt takee it anymoree!! SOBBS. **cryiin noww** sobbs. no onee can eveerr stopp mahh tearrs from flowiin downn anymoree. sobbs. darr oni onee tt can stop mahh tearrs from flowiin downn ishh darr onee makee miee cryy. sobbs. i almostt wentt insanee. deree ishh nothinn in darr worldd causiin sho muchh paiin. ife i coulldd between lovee and deathh. i ratherr nortt habb loveen andd die. love ishh sweet. ishh wonderful. budd it causes too much paiin. sobb. im reallii lostt. donno wadd tuhh do. sobbs. ma keyybordd ishh noww al wett. sobbs. I HATEE LOVEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sobbs.

2004-12-14T09:54:00.000-08:00

sobbs. sobbs. i din sleep yesterdaee. sobbs. i stayy urpp andd thinkk ef alott ef thinggs. sobbs. i realli donno wadd aree euu thinkiin aboutt. sobbs. confusedd. didd euu everr love miee beforee? sobbs. u saidd yes. budd i thinkk u r stil confuseddd withh urr feelinss barhh. sobb. i hate al tis. whyy mus al tis happens on miee? sobbs. i realli lykke euu alott. andd tis ish howw eu breakk ma harttt. sobbs. i donwann tis endiin. sobbs. sobbs. whyy mus i go thruu al tis paiin? whyy? sobbs. i hate ma life!!!!!!!!!! i hate wadd im goiin thru noww!!! yesterdaee thinggs weree finee.. budd it jus one daee. andd thinggs turnn outt liddartt. sobbs. i jus wishh tt i can livee iin yesterdaee foreveerr......

=(

2004-12-13T16:39:00.000-08:00

afraiid tuhh lose euu.

sighh!

2004-12-11T16:03:00.000-08:00

tudaee ma mummiee dischargee fromm darr hospital.. sho happiee! hee. hm. christmas ishh cummin.. nidd tuhh go buyy christmas presentt lerhh. **thinnkkin ef wadd tuhh buyy**
hais.. noww vehh confusedd nehh.. thinkiin boutt wadd eu saidd tuhh miee yesterrdaee.. was it real.. hais.. las tymme euu aso saidd tt tuhh miee.. budden in darr endd.. hais.. sho tis tymme.. its realli hardd ferr miee tuhh believe yeww.. hais.. miee don wishh tuhh gett hurtt anymoree.. i realli donwann.. tis feww daees.. i tot i alreadii gavee urpp lerhh.. andd readii tuhh acceptt anotherr personn.. budd.. u suddenlii tel miee tt.. darr toopidd feelinggs weree backk agaiin.. hais.. andd tis tymmee.. strongerr.. omgg.. wadd shouldd ii do noww?!!?!??!?!?!?!?!?! hais..

noww feelinn betterr..

2004-12-10T01:07:00.000-08:00

hais.. noww feelinn betterr lerhh.. knowiin tt ma mummiee ishh okiee.. =) wentt outt withh gordonn tuudaee.. go plaee toopiddz pool.. miee c him plaee lorhh.. hahas.. denn afterr tt wentt tuhh darr hospital c ma mommie.. hee. she jus hadd herr dinnerr.. lols.. andd feelin betterr.. =D.. lols..

pheww

2004-12-09T07:54:00.000-08:00

pheww! tudaee scaree miee nehhs.. cos ma mummiee pregnant marhh.. den she suddenlii stomachh paiin.. denn bleedd lorhh.. miee scaredd untill!!! miee cryy n cry lorhh.. sobbs.. vehh scaredd nehhs.. hais.. denn noww she stayinn in hospitall lorhh.. hais.. miee vehh worryy nehh.. sobbz.. buddenn doctorr saee she okaee larhh.. sho noww feelin a lil bitt betterr.. haiis.. jus hope tt ma motherr andd lil babyy ll be finee.. haiss.. havenn eatt ma dinneerr yett.. no appetitee.. hais.. noww tokiin on darr fonee.. stil no moodd.. hais..

SUCKORR BITCHH BIGG BOOBBS

2004-12-08T20:29:00.000-08:00

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! miee angriie wanna die lerhh!!! cannortt standd itt lerhh!! wah kaOz.. **kaobeii**fuckkerr*bitchh*slut*toopidd gal hu thinkk tt herr boobs vehh bigg**suckerr**chibai!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! tooppidd lorhh.. todaee gortt saint johnn trainin.. denn afterr footdril we wentt ferr lunchh.. andd we oni hav 1/2 an hourr tuhh eatt.. nortt enufff tymme at al lorhh.. den we weree latee by 10 minss.. sirr naii sae we latee ferr 1/2 an hourr lorhh!! kaOz.. denn we quarrel quarrel!! darr toopidd janet saee horr.. - u al nortt happiee can don cumme saint johnn - wah laOz.. den samantha cannortt takke it lerhh.. she straighttawayy slam darr door andd wentt outt.. den siewlingg miee huiyu follow lorhh.. samanthaa verr ke liann nehh.. she criedd lorhh.. cos todaee beforee she wentt outt.. she was scolded by herr parentts.. herr mum don believe tt she gortt saint john todaee.. hais.. den i console herr lorhh.. miee consolee herr until ii cryy.. sobbs.. sobbss.. sobb.. weepps.. den in darr endd we waitt til darr dismissal tymme outtsidee den reportt tuhhh sir nai.. den we leavee.. haishh.. todaee realli hadd a badd daee.. al mood gonee.. sobbs.. no faithh in saintt johnn anymoree.. sobbs.. muhh fav cca.. sJab.. hais.. actualliee we al alreadii hav a feelin tt sumthingg ll happenn todaee.. sobbs.. wadd happenedd tuhh saintt johnn.. hais.. whyy mus thinggs turn outt liddatt? sobbs.. sobb.. i realli vehh sadd lorhh.. andd angrii too.. sobbs.. saintt johnn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

wadd happenedd?

2004-12-08T10:06:00.000-08:00

sobb.. whyy mus sho mani things happen tuhh miee todaee.. jus noww ma fwenn donno saee wadd.. hais.. whyy mus thinggs turn outt liddartt? he saee he donn wanna hav fwenns includin miee al those type ef thinggs.. he sae wadd no real fwens in tis worldd.. he wanna be lonerr.. wadd actualliee happenedd? hais.. howw can ppl livin in tis worldd wihhoutt fwenss.. hais.. buddenn no matterr wadd.. i ll stil treatt him as fwenn derhh lorhh.. hais.. WADD HAPPENEDD? WHYY TODAEE SHO UNLUCKII? SHO FAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! wishh tt i can sleep andd treatt nuthinn happenedd todaee.. sobb.

sho siann```

2004-12-06T19:57:00.000-08:00

hais.. todaee ssaintt johnn learnn neww footdrill ferr orientationn lorhh.. siann nehh.. miee do until burr blurr liddartt.. hee.. den afterr tt wentt out wihh caroll..go iMm findd zhihuii.. cos she workke deree marhh.. denn afta tt actualliee wanna go watchh muvee derhh.. budd cancelledd in darr endd lorhh.. haishh.. siann nehh.. den playin maplee jus noww.. lols.. level urpp lerhh.. yayy!! hee.. mus go backk plaee lerhh.. hee.. V(o^-'o)V

sobbs.. whyy ishhit sho hardd tu forgett eu.. forgett everythingg..

2004-12-05T19:22:00.000-08:00

whyy ishhit sho hardd tu forgett eu.. forgett everythingg.. sobbs.. i talkk andd luff loudd.. is becausee.. i am tryin tu forgett thatt im sadd.. wadd did i do tu deserve aol tis pain.. everydaee.. i get a littlee worsee.. i donnoe howw muchh more can i takke.. will i eva be okaee?.. in darr pastt.. i donnoe lovee.. until it breakks ma harrtt.. ifee euu eva tel miee nortt tu frownn.. andd nortt tu be sadd.. i ll tel u i alreadii forgotteen howw tu smilee.. andd wadds darr feelin lykke tu be happiee.. actin lykke nothinn happenss ishh wadd i havv tu do every daee.. sobb.. i am realli tryinn hardd tu forgett euu.. sobbs..

siann nehh.. haishh..

2004-12-05T13:05:00.000-08:00

haishh.. siann nehh.. noww tokinn en darr fonee.. haishh.. siann nehh.. haishh.. tmlo gortt saintt.johnn.. siann!! siann!! sian!! jus finished playinn maplee.. wanna level urpp nehh.. hee.. i jus changedd ma blogskinn.. lols.. nicee marhh.. hee.. (o^-'o)V.. denn noww gortt tagg boardd lerhh.. finalliee.. hee.. =D.. lols.. noww otherr ppl ke yi tagg wo derr taggboardd lerhh.. hee.. i keeppe askinn ppl tagg.. budden.. dey al tagg rubbishh.. haishh.. hahas.. noww gortt cough.. sho patheticc.. tmlo stil nidd tuhh go saint johnn.. haishh.. budden cannortt neberr go.. mus train footdril fer orientation marhh.. sighhs~.. jus noww wholee daee cleanin ma room.. cupboardss.. realisee tt i harb alottx eff rubbwishh.. lol x=.. hahass.. **yawnn** siann nehh.. haishh.. goingg tuh orhh orhh lerhh larhh.. stil harbb tuhh wakee urpp ealii tmloo.. siann bo.. haishh.. budenn miee don feel lykkee sleepin at all.. haishh.. siann!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

=Pp

2004-12-02T13:10:00.000-08:00

hahas.. noww sho siann.. writinn ma blogg in darr middle eff darr lecturee.. hee.. haishh.. tis toopidd lecturee.. verr borinn nehh.. haishh.. attendin darr saint johnn computerr course lorhh.. siann sian siann.. darr lecturerr noww askinn questionns.. lols.. haishh.. sho longg neberr blogg lerhh.. wanna changee ma blogskinn ver soon.. sickk eff seeingg darr samee bloggskinn everydaee.. muss changee.. hee.. anotherr halff an hourr.. darr lecturee ll endd.. **yiPee** lols.. denn afterrwardds goinn jurongg pointt wihh huiyu carol andd samantha.. lols.. miee n huiyu secretliin plann tu lisiao carol afterwardd.. `` evil laughtterr`` lolss.. carol wan dan lerhh!!! hee.. (o^.'o).. winkks.. =Pp.. darr lecturerr tokinn crappes noww.. lols.. siann.. noww verr hungrii nehh.. neberr eatt breakfast til noww.. haishh.. aiyohhx!! cannortt tinkk eff foodd noww!! noww on a diet.. sobb.. sho mani foodd cannortt eat!!! ahhhh!! don karee lerhh.. hee.. i mus eatt no matter wadd.. lols.. cfmm fat fat niaox.. haishh.. patheticc gall.. ahass.. cannortt typee lerhh.. lecturerr wanna kil miee ife he foundds outt..

cryin in darr harrtt

2004-11-29T21:48:00.000-08:00

haishh.. noww feelin abitt betterr.. haishh.. oni abitt.. wen i cumme tu darr thoughtt eff it.. tearrs stil fallinn downn ma cheekks.. haishh.. deep in ma harrtt.. i am sufferinn n cryiinn.. budd on darr outtsidee.. i am smilinn.. pretendinn tt i hav forgottenn al tiss.. sobb.. al tis actinn aree sho tirin.. haishh.. wo hao leii.. i am sickk eff fallin in andd outt eff lovee.. sobb.. noww.. i jus havv tu acceptt darr facctt.. sobb.. whyy ishh darr reality sho cruell.. no matterr howw hardd i tryy.. ma dreamm jus cantt cumme truee.. haishh.. noww.. itts al ovarrhh.. andd i don wishh tu thinkk eff tis lerhh.. noww i hav tu consolee ma self by sayinn.. *remmains as fwenss aso can* *lovee ishh jus partt ef lifwee* haishh.. sobb.. don wishh tu decievee maselff animore.. budd wadd can i du to makee maselff feel betterr rytee.. haishh..

2004-11-29T13:07:00.000-08:00

sobb.. howw i wishh i hadd neberr gonee thruu al tis.. sobb.. noww den i realisee u habb hurtt miee moree den anyonee elsee didd.. sobb.. wenn i sae i am sadd.. it ishh nortt jus purelly sadd.. i wass cryin in ma hartt do u noee tt? sobb.. i bett u din noee.. sobb.. i blamee maselff ferr beingg suchh a failuree in everythingg i du.. sobb.. nobodie couldd undderstandd howw i feel noww.. nortt even uu.. nortt even u.. sobb.. u saidd urr hartt shattereedd too.. wen ma hartt shatteredd.. budd.. i bett urr hartt din shateredd in millionn n billionn piecess lykke minee.. u wunn noee howw i feel noww.. lostt n feel lykke dyinn noww.. sobb.. ma worldd has fallen APARTT.. everythingg has endded.. sobb.. i noee it wasnt darr endd eff darr worldd yett.. budd whyy am i feelin as iff daarr nextt secondd i am dyinn.. sobb.. harttbrokenn.. couldd anioneeee save miee.. i hatte darr heavenn ferr beingg sho cruel and UNFAIRR tu miee.. its sho unfairr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2004-11-29T09:17:00.001-08:00

sobb.. yesterdaee i tott afterr a goodd sleepp i ll feel betterr.. budd.. sobb.. todaee i wokee uprr.. andd ma firstt thoughtt wass uu.. sobb.. immediatelyy.. i criedd.. sobb.. whyy muss i wakee upee in darr firstt placee.. howw i wishh i nevaa wakee upee.. i wass nevaa bornn tu enduree aL dis pain.. sobb.. whyy mus heavenn be sho cruell tu miee.. whyy mus everybodii be sho cruell tu miee.. sobb.. i wass nortt bornn tu go throughh al tis pain.. sobb.. I AM NORTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sobb.. i do believee truee lovee du existts budd.. itt ll nevaa happenss on miee..

2004-11-29T09:17:00.000-08:00

am i wrongg?

2004-11-28T21:49:00.000-08:00

haishh.. am i actualli wrongg tu believee in lovee? andd actualli believee wadd u saidd tu miee.. sobb.. SOBB.. u brokee ma hartt in piecess.. andd madee miee pickk itt upee one by onee tu mendd itt.. sobb.. andd lett miee tel uu.. no mattaa howw longg darr woundd has recoverr.. itt ll still habb scarss on itt.. sobb.. regrettt likin uu..

yay!!

2004-11-28T01:58:00.000-08:00

hahass.. jus camee backk fromm jayy's concertt.. omgg.. damnn nicee norhh.. realli verr nicee!! ma cousin gavee miee free tickett.. hee.. viP seatss summoree.. lols.. (^.^).. haiyohh.. he verr shuaii nehh.. i ll nortt forgett todaee derhh.. hee.. hee realli verr shuaii norhh.. especialli wen he ishh playinn darr pianoo.. hee.. i boughtt a jayy watchh andd a wristt bandd.. hee.. verrr nicee.. yipEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hee..

2004-11-27T15:47:00.000-08:00

lols.. todaee wentt out wihh gordonn.. lols.. tt toopidd boii.. =X.. hee.. wentt tu westmall.. hahass.. tt violentt guyy.. hahass.. wen wentt tu buyy discc lorhh.. tuu helpp himm burn songgs marhh.. den boughtt naruto.. usin his moneyy.. sho paisehh.. lols.. den walk walkk heree andd deree.. hahass.. on darr wayy miee keep on droppin thinggs andd moneyy. hee.. todaee weirdd weirddd derhh.. lols.. denn afterr tt i wentt tu shereen's hsee norhh.. hee.. den tokk corkk tokk corkk.. hhass.. shereen tt lamerr.. lols.. den wentt homee eaarlii.. coss lata goin jay's concertt.. yaY!!!.. lols.. can c tt biGggggg shuaii ge lerhh.. hee.. goinn wihh ma cousinn.. again.. anotherr toopidd boii.. =X.. hee.. aiyohh.. cannortt lidatt saee himm.. cos he ishh darr onee treatinn miee tu jay's concertt derhh.. hee.. (^.')winkkwinkk** lols.. i bett todaee ll be ma happiestt daee ef ma fourtteenn yearsshee. =D.. cantt stopp smilin.. lols.. yIPee!!! **whee..

u din noe tt u hurtt miee..

2004-11-25T09:58:00.000-08:00

sobb.. u wentt tu suchh extentt andd u din even noee u hurtt miee sho muchh.. sobb.. u saidd u wantedd tu hugg miee and tel mie u lykke miee.. i was sho happiee at tt momentt.. budden u suddenlii sae ITS AL OVER.. sobb.. i nearlyy cryy u noee.. i realli don understandd u.. sobb.. sobb.. lovin a person ish sho terriblee.. sobb.. in darr firstt placee.. u jus tel miee u lykke miee can lerhh marhh.. sobb.. AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I DON LYKKE TIS ENDINN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!WHY WHYY WHY!!!!!!!!!!!

=(

2004-11-25T06:56:00.000-08:00

sobb.. wadd happenedd.. wadd happened tu eu.. suddenlii sae sho mani weirdd weirdd thinggs.. sobb.. haishh.. sumtymss i realli regrett likin eu.. haishh.. u ask miee outt.. andd i rejected.. u saee u gortt alott ef thingg stu tel miee.. budd u hadnt hadd a chancee.. i realli donno u gortt sumthingg tu tel miee.. sobb.. if i kneww it earlierr.. i ll go outt wihh u.. sobb.. haishh.. budd in darr endd u stil din tel miee.. eu askk miee tu forgett u.. forgett everythingg boutt eu.. u thinkk sho easyy mehh? forgettin a person u lykke andd u cherishh sho easyy arhh.. sobb.. u wun understandd derhh.. sobb.. i realli verr sadd noww.. sobb.. whyy mus u hurtt miee liddatt.. wen see ma heartt shatteredd.. doess urrs crackk too? sobb..

yipee!!

2004-11-22T23:10:00.000-08:00

hee.. finallii wentt tu rebondd ma hairr lerhh.. hee.. noww verr straighhtt lerhh.. hee.. $200 plusplus nehh.. of cos narhh.. orelsee i go beatt upp darr hairrdresserr.. -arbishh-.. hee.. miee nortt sho badd larhh.. lols.. sieww lingg n huiyuu alreadii rebondd lerhh.. lolss.. buddenn horr.. thiss thursdaee ma skool's openn housee norhh.. mus wearr full u.. nidd tu tiee al ourr hairr intu a hairnett.. siann nehh.. den horr.. afterr rebondd cannortt tiee hairr derrhh.. den miee go begg ma officerr norhh.. miee begg n begg.. hee.. finallii ma officerr saee dunidd tu ''bun'' upe ourr hairr.. YAY.. hee.. noww tokinn on darr fonee withh caroll.. lolss.. jus put downn darr fonee wihh yiqingg.. haiyo.. poor thingg nehh.. yiqingg calledd miee n keep on cryin n cryin.. haiyoo.. miee listenn lerhh.. aso wanna cryy.. sobss.. tt TOOPID chua changg xuann norhh!!! humpff!! bullyy yiqingg.. toopidd boii.. one daee i gonna slapp his facee lerhh.. keep on avoidin yiqingg.. toopid hum chi!! he shouldd facee theirr relationshipp seriouslii... and nortt avoidin.. haishh.. as an outsiderr.. i shouldnt interfere.. haishh..

haishh.. lovee? cann i trustt lovee?

2004-11-20T12:17:00.000-08:00

haishh.. im realli vehh tiredd.. haishh.. disappointedd in lovee.. verr verr disappointedd.. am i wrongg tu fall in lovee widd eu? am i? i guess sho barhh.. haishh.. i guess.. itz tymme tu givee upe.. i havv no confidencee at al.. andd i don wishh to hangg on anymoree.. wo hao lei.. i am realli sickk of tiss.. haishh.. perhapss.. i shouldntt lykke eu in darr firstt placee.. its ma faultt.. haishh.. sobb.. sobb.. haishh.. u aree darr onee hu gavee miee hopee derhh.. butt in darr endd.. sobb.. i hatee eu!!! sobb.. wo hen si ni lerhh!! wo tao yen ni!! sobb.. can i forgett eu? i wishh i can..

shouldd i?

2004-11-19T21:02:00.000-08:00

haishh.. verr verr confusedd narhh.. keepp askinn maselff whetherr shouldd i hangg on annortt.. shouldd i continuee likinn him?.. haishh.. realli donno narhh.. haishh.. confusedd.. haiyo.. don tokk boutt tis unhappiee thinggs lerhh..
hee.. todaee worr.. wentt tu sheenaa housee afterr st.johnn.. beforee tt.. wentt tu macc lorhh.. everyboddi was almostt starve tu deathh lerhh.. hee.. hungryy until.. hahass.. cos neberr eatt breakfastt marhh.. den st.johnn latee dismissal.. denn go sheenaa housee tokk tokk.. chatt chatt.. hahass.. denn we go li siaoo jianrongg.. hee.. calledd himm.. denn hahass.. toldd him lotsaa toopidd thinggs.. hahaass.. jianrongg.. realli sorwiee worr.. cos we tt tymmee realli nothinn tu do marhh.. hahass.. lolz..
jus finishedd watchinn singaporeee idioll.. hee.. ma darlin slyvesterr gortt intuu grandd finalss lerhh.. hee.. slyvesterr reallii vehh cutee nehh.. hee.. (^.').. lolz..
shouldd i?

siann nehh.. sighh..

2004-11-18T22:15:00.000-08:00

haishh.. todaee vehh vehh siann arhh!!! accompanii samanthaa go skool norhh.. ferr saintt.johnn stockk checckk norhh.. haishh.. siann nehh.. haiyoo.. denn go comicss connectionn boughtt 5 comicx in one go.. $25.. haishh.. brokee lerhh.. haishh.. siann nehh..

^(oO)^

2004-11-16T22:40:00.000-08:00

haishh.. afterr tt toopidd st.johnn wentt outt withh gordonn norhh.. hahass.. he hadd a neww hairr cutt.. muchh muchh moree shuaii lerhh.. at leastt betterr den beforee.. lolz.. hee.. andd we walkk walkk heree n deree lorhh.. helpedd him choosee pantss al tiss narhh.. denn afterr tt he wentt awayy coss he gortt pool competitionn.. hahass.. denn miee n sieww lingg ma dearr dearr wentt tu darr macc tu havv ourr lunchh.. andd denn libraryy talkk talkk norhh..we jus satt downn deree n tokk ferr a vehh vehh longg tymmee.. boutt 2 or moree hourrs liddat.. hee.. hadd a greatt chatt widd herr.. hee.. den wentt homee afterr tt.. watchedd ren wo ao youu norhh.. todaee ishh darr lastt episodee.. andd i lykkee darr endinn alott.. hee.. tmlo stil gorttt onee shortt onee.. beforeee darr neww showw.. hee.. i wishhh.. kaiweii can be wihh jingwenn.. ^^.. hee.. ren wo ao you rox!!!!!!!!!!!

haishh..

2004-11-16T22:15:00.000-08:00

haishh.. sighh.. sighh.. todaee moodd vehh vehh badd arhh.. humpf!.. arguee withh yijunn deyy al.. haishh.. overr sumthingg lorhh.. denn miee n huiyu cannortt standd it lerhh.. vehh vehh angryy.. den endd up.. bothh ef us shoutin at ourr seniorrs.. haishh.. realli vehh angryy norhh.. deyy al spilledd darr paintts overr darr bannerrs andd floorr lorhh.. butt endd up.. we cleanin al darr mess.. ARGH!!.. denn nortt ourr faultt.. we hav tu cleann up.. humpff!!.. darr worsee thingg ishh horr.. janett toldd us lorhh.. *one dropp eff paintt 5 pushh up*.. den deres a pool ef paintt dere lorhh.. kaObeii.. nortt we spill derhh horr.. endd upp.. we cleann.. denn miee n huiyu vehh vehh nortt happiee.. denn wentt tu darr canteenn andd scoldd tt bigg groupp ef sec 1s n 2s.. denn in darr endd deyy wentt widd us tu cleann up darr mess.. butt showinn us attitudee.. suckOrs!!.. we theirr seniorr horr!!!.. den in darr endd gortt meetinn.. everybodiee tellin theirr unhappiness tu officerr.. butt miee huiyu siew lingg sheena sam deyy al neberr speakk anythingg at all.. haishh.. i jus cannortt understandd.. yijunn aso orientation headd norhh.. buddenn she seems tu be doin nthh.. nthh at all.. everythingg aso cum askk miee.. shee aso IC.. i aso IC.. canntt shee be moree decisivee andd decidee thinggs on her ownn.. i am alreaddi vehh stressedd lerhh.. hadd tu take chargee ef everythingg.. den hass tu practise footdrill withh huiyu deyy al.. argh!!.. HAD A BADD DAEE!!!! ARGHH!!!

sobbin gal.. ='(..

2004-11-15T19:03:00.000-08:00

sobb.. sobb.. noww verr verr sadd narhh.. sobb.. althoughh i am hurtt deepp insidee ma hearrtt.. butt.. i stil havv tu pretendd tt im okaee infrontt of eu.. do eu noee.. manni tymmes i wantedd tu cryy.. sobb.. butt.. i hav tu control muaaselff.. sobb.. zhen de hen xin ku.. zhen de.. sobb.. i hate it.. i hatee tu pretendd finee infrontt of eu.. andd lett peoplee thinkk tt i hav alreadii forgottenn u.. sobb.. i stil lykke eu alott.. alott.. sobb.. yesterdaee u askk miee whyy i lykke u.. sobb.. i aso donno.. i donno wadd cause miee tu fal in lurrff wihh eu.. sobb.. do eu noee tt.. urr lil wordss meanss alott tu miee.. do u noee tt.. sobb.. i am tiredd n sickk of tis lerhh.. sobb.. wo hao lei.. zhen de hao lei.. hao lei.. i cant standd it lerhh.. gonna diee lerhh.. haishh.. can i stopp al tis.. stopp pretendinn.. andd stopp maselff fromm fallin deeperr n deepperr intu tis holee tt hass no happiee endings?.. can i?.. sobb.. haishh... wadd happenedd tu miee exactlyy? i realli donno.. no matterr howw manii tearrs i hav fallen.. itt wun change anythingg.. wadd i can du.. sobb.. i alreadii promisedd myselff nortt tu cryy ferr u lerhh.. butt i jus cantt stopp ma tearss fromm fallin......

todaee wentt tu muaa senior's housee..

2004-11-14T22:45:00.000-08:00

hee. todaee wentt tu muaa seniorr's housee norhh.. miee huiyu siew lingg kian leongg and thaneshh wentt dere. haiyo. haiyo. miee n ma bao beii sieww lingg hadd a hardd tymme findin ourr senior's hse.. findd heree findd dere n walkedd a longg distancee.. walked until we dyin lerhh.. haiyoo.. den finalliee foundd it.. coss muaa baobeii madee a mistakee norhh.. hahass.. den i scoldd herr scoldd herr.. hee.. =Pp.. err.. wen reachedd dere tt tymme.. mie wentt into muaa senior's room.. togetherr withh huiyu dey al.. deyy reachedd dere earlierr marhh.. wen we go in tt tymmee.. muaa seniorr ask us tu go tu darr kitchenn n eatt.. butt horr.. huiyu thaneshh toldd us.. deres sumthingg verr disgustin outsidee n told us don everr look intu darr hall.. wahh.. miee n siew lingg scaredd untill.. omgg.. don dare tu go outt lerhh.. finallii we wentt outt.. omgg.. i accidentallie look into darr hall.. OMG.. i saww onee yellow freakk!!!! onee gal wearin yelloww dress or dono wadd.. OMG.. herr facee damn disgustin norhh..she looks lykke a man.. butt dress lykke a gal.. eeeeekkk!!! den huiyu toldd miee.. she ish a guyy.. AHHHHHHHHH!!!!! miee scaredd until.. omgg.. hahass.. den playedd pokerr cardss norhh..den miee siew lingg huiyu sitt downn deree tokt tokk.. hahaass.. den wentt homee afterr tt.. sian sian sianz until noww..

^(oO)^

2004-11-13T20:56:00.000-08:00

sighh.. everydaee nothinn tu do.. haix.. jus hadd a housee cleaninn.. heez.. muaa cupboards al verr messy.. lykke rubbishh bin liddatt.. bleahh.. heez.. digg outt lotsaa thinggs.. hahaz.. denn shereenn cammee tu muaa housee.. tok tokk norhh.. haiyoo.. sianzz nehh.. noww nothinn tu do..
yesterdaee wentt tu bugiss go shoppinn.. heez.. took neoprintt widd muaa sis.. boughtt onee converse t shirtt.. pink colourr derhh.. hahaz.. nicee nehh.. andd denn lotsa thinggs narhh.. bleahh.. den wentt tu ate ajiSen.. the daee beforee jus wentt widd carOll.. hahass.. butt nicee narhh.. (=.. yum*yum*.. kakas.. haiyo.. butt horr.. met a weirdd guyy in aJisen.. haiyoo.. scaree miee nehh.. tt guyy keep on smilin at miee.. denn horr.. wen servin foodd tt tymmee.. wah laO.. hiss bodyy goinn tu pastee on minee lerhh.. eek!.. denn wenn we leavee tt tymmee.. he uses tt kindd of weirdd weirdd expression tu look at miee.. *puke*.. hate itt mann.. haiyoo.. don saee lerhh.. ~_~.. heez.. btw horr.. miee goinn tu rebornn muaa hairr verr soon lerhh.. humpf!! caroll neberr waitt ferr miee.. she wentt tu rebornn her hairr firstt lerhh.. hahass... butt nvm narhh.. hees.. huggin muaa darlinn piGgy noww.. hees.. sho cutee!!.. lols.. goinn.. nidd tu habb muaa dinnerr lerhh..

hee.. bLurr pigg

2004-11-11T09:21:00.000-08:00

lol.. hee.. miee horr.. yesterdaee verr blurr nehh.. miee forgortt tu off darr comm.. bleahh.. den muaa comm remains on til todaee.. lol.. denn gortt ppl chat withh miee on msn.. miee neberr replyy.. bleahh.. miee realli verry blurr nehh.. (( sotongg ]].. hahass.. nono.. i am a pigg.. hmm.. sho i am a // sotong pig \\.. lolx.. lamee larhh.. crap sho longg.. lol.. sighh.. zhijiee legg injuredd nehh.. sho sadd.. he saee wun die wun die onee larhh.. aiyoo.. den askk miee don worryy.. tiss boi arhh.. sighh!!.. butt i stil advisedd him tu restt well.. takkairee.. andd don alwaex jump ardd lykke shenjingbing liddat.. lolx.. bleahh.. hahass.. no larhh.. (=.. hees.. zhijiee ishh realli a good fwenn norhh.. laz tymme i kena di siao at chalett deree.. he wanna helpp miee settle sia.. lolx.. den beforee exams tt tymmee.. miee don understandd darr geographyy thinggy norhh.. den zhijiee helpedd miee revisee overr darr nightt.. cox he wennt ferr extra remedial lessons marhh.. hahass... denn wen i failedd muaa examss.. he ll consolee miee derhh lorhh.. he ll sitt besidee miee.. den sae sae sae lorh.. hahass.. laz tymee i failedd muaa mathss.. den i crushedd his exam paperrs.. lol.. butt he don mindd norhh.. den ask miee don be sad tis type of things larhh.. hahass.. zhijiee.. realli thanx horr.. thanks thanks thanks.. hundreds thousands and millions of thankss.. hee..

sighh.. lostt..

2004-11-10T22:05:00.000-08:00

lolx.. jus noww chatt widd jianrongg.. sho funniee sia.. bothh of uss complainin boutt ourr maidss.. hahass.. jianrongg's maidd damn funny sia.. hahass... mie luff until.. hahass.. - gOne-.. miee go watchh tv firstt.. lata den sum backk n continuee ma blogg.. back!!!sighh.. juss finishedd watchinn (( ren wo ai you )).. sighh.. tt yilin realli sux tu darr coree man.. can believe itt.. haiyoo.. harm people can harm until liddatt.. sighh.. suddenlyy i felt sho lostt.. donno howw tu describe tiss feelinn.. juss.. jus a momentt of sorroww barhh.. sighh.. aiyoo.. wadd is happenin tu miee nowadayss.. haiyoo.. miee keep tellin myselff.. withoutt love.. nvm derhh marhh.. withoutt himm wun die derhh.. butt.. sighh.. haix.. nobodyy ll understandd howw i feel derhh.. cozz.. mie aso donno wadd am i thinkin exactlyy.. sighh.. firstt tymme feltt sho sho sho lostt and unsuree of myselff.. can anbodyy tel miee wadd tu do.. sighh.. wheree can i go tu lett go of darr painn i am feelin noww.. sobb..

sighh.. sianzz..

2004-11-09T22:37:00.000-08:00

sianz todaee.. ferr muaa afternoon nap..sleptt ferr 5-7 hours barhh.. lykke shitt.. cozz.. reallii nothin tu do marhh.. and or.h or.h norhh.. sleep sleep sleep.. miee pigg marhh.. cannortt blamee.. sighh.. bleahhh.. lolx.. ^(oO)^.. oinkoinkss.. bleahh.. andd walk walk in ma whole housee.. on off darr tv.. sianz bo... sighh.. den c comicss norhh.. shereen introducee derhh.. realli verr nicee.. hahass.. ma dear dear shereen is dar bestt.. bleahh..
suddenlyy.. gordonn ask miee tis question.. wadd is important tu u in ma life..
i think n thinkk..
love? family? and fwens?
yepps.. familyy cos deyy ll be dere ferr u thru thick n thin.. den coxx i love demm marhh..
fwens coz.. u can share ur probs withh demm wen u cant tel ur familyy memberss...
ma love? coz.. i believe no matterr how strongg a gal ishh.. she nidds a boi tu be deree ferr herr tu kare ferr herr.. to share herr worriess.. sorrow.. and happiness of coz.. yepps.. m i right..
sighh.. tu miee.. life ish sho meaningless.. and borinn too..

lifee ishh sho meaningless

2004-11-09T14:46:00.000-08:00

sighh.. everydaee nothin tu do.. i m goin bonkerss lerhh.. verr soon.. i ll be stayin in woodbridgee.. sighh.. jus hadd a bath.. lata nidd tu go dentaL checkk up againn..sianz bo.. sighh.. jus finishedd readinn comicc.. *death note*.. wahh.. realli verr nicee nehh... hahas.. i wann tu buyy volume 3.. ahhhhhhh!!!!.. book shopp out of stockk lerhh.. humpff!!.. sighh.. *death note*.. ishh a storyy tt sayss..
darr death of godd leftt hiss deathh notee in darr human worldd..
hencee he camee downn tu darr human world tu collectt tis death note..
namess whichh are written in tis death notee so calledd as a book.. ll diee.. denn tis book ishh pickedd up by a boi namedd LIGHT.. and den bla bla bla... hahas..
tis book realli ver nice larhh..
*lols*.. haiyoo.. noww verr sianzz arhh... haix.. miee wanna change muaa hp.. tu x4o0.. sighh.. muaa dreamm fonee.. lol.. realli ver nicee lorhh.. if anyonee can buyy ferr miee arhh.. miee ll suree be verr touchedd derhh.. hahas.. muaa parentts norhh... lolx.. (=..
sighh.. oops.. gonna be latee ferr ma dental check up lerhh.. hahass.. gtg.. bye..

oops!

2004-11-08T16:02:00.000-08:00

hahass.. todaee actualli nidd tu go meet gordonn... accompanii himm go collectt sumthingg derhh.. butt horr.. heez.. miee wakee up latee.. bleahh.. denn he cal muaa hp.. i neberr pickk up.. cozz miee off muaa hP vibrationn marhh.. hahass.. *4 miss cal* fromm himm.. denn wen i realiseee i latee lerhh.. miee fasterr go showerr den changee.. haiyoo.. on darr wayy tu meet him.. he saee dunidd lerhh.. coz he alreadiii collectedd himselff.. and he tot i nortt goin lerhh.. cozz i neberr pickk up his fone marhh.. denn he wentt home himself!!! humpf!!!!.. haixx.. butt nvmm narhh.. miee wake up latee ishh muaa faultt....

err.. sianzz..

2004-11-08T07:32:00.000-08:00

sianzz nehh.. sianz sianz sianzz.. cannortt sleepp.. siannz nehh.. todaee wentt tu shereenz housee.. too sianxx lerhh.. ttz whyy.. lol.. luckilyy gortt shereenn.. (=.. ma dear dearr.. kakass..

(=.. better mood todaee lerhh..

2004-11-08T03:43:00.000-08:00

gortt better mood todaee lerhh.. but still gortt abitt sadsad narhh.. butt neva mindd narhh.. i tot i ll zi bi ferr a feww dayyss nehh.. butt.. to myy surprisee.. i did nortt.. donno whyy.. mayb ishh bcozz i did nortt lykke himm sho deeplyy.. maybb.. butt.. good marhh.. sighh.. at darr thoughtt of itt.. still verr sad narhh.. gortt feww tymmess wantedd tu cryy.. butt.. nevaaa... i cannortt wastee ma tearss marhh.. heez.. butt savee.. bleahh... =).. realli thankss thosee hu cheeredd miee up.. especialli.. carol.. sam.. sheena.. huiyu.. andd ma dear shereenn.. heezz.. feelinn much muchh moree betterr.. i noee... lovee cannortt be forcee marhh.. thuss i did nortt forcee eu.. i alreadii thinkk overr itt thoroughlyy lerhh.. it ishh betterr tu remainss as fwenn.. tu be laz tymme wen we jokee togetherr.. sharee our thoughtss.. heez.. realli happiee tu hav a fwenn lykke u.. lifwe ishh shortt.. we shouldd stayy happiee everydaee as longg as we aree alivee.. otherrdenn lovee.. we still gortt alott of importantt thinggs tu do nehh.. kakass.. butt.. i am wonderingg noww.. can we still be good fwens lykke beforr.. where we can tokk on darr fonee everydaee.. til midnightt?.. i doubt..

once again, heartbroken..

2004-11-07T07:45:00.000-08:00

sobb.. tossin ard ma bedd darr whole nytee.. i din sleep.. keep thinkinn of eu... and cried darr whole nyte too.. sobb.. wo xiang le hao duo shi.. butt.. sobb.. sobb.. it seems thatt afterr a big big cryy.. i don feel muchh betterr.. butt moreee worsee.. sobb.. whyy mus eu break ma heartt intu millionn piecess.. i hadd enuff of tiss.. sobb.. darr reasonn whyy i did nortt steadd withh eu.. although i lykke eu.. ishh becoz.. i noee.. i noee.. u havenn gett overr tt gal yett.. tt ish darr reasonn ferr darr numbers of rejectionn.. sobb.. sobb.. it hurtts miee tu rejectt eu.. butt.. butt.. sobb.. wadd can i du if eu stil lykke herr ryte?.. sobb.. i understandd tt lovee cannortt be forcee.. i understandd.. butt... sobb.. realityy sux.. it suxx tu darr coree.. i wishedd nevaa kneww darr truthh.. butt.. sobb.. i realli wan tu hatee eu... i realli wantt.. butt i cannortt bringg myself tu hatee eu.. SOBB.. i am realli feelin verr verr terriblee noww.. sobb.. i reali nidd alott of tymme tu recoverr.. alott.. sobb.. laz tymmee i am hurtt by one guyy deeplyy.. noww too.. butt.. u hurttx miee moree deeplyy.. andd maybb.. i cann nevaa recoverr again.. sobb.. whyy mus darr world be sho cruell.. whyy.. whyy.. whyy..

sobxx!!!!!!!!!!!!

2004-11-07T04:43:00.000-08:00

sobb.. sobb.. verr verr sadd.. sobb.. cryinn noww.. whyy mus eu giv miee hope in dar firstt placee.. whyy.. whyy.. sobb.. realli heartbrokenn.. totallyy heartbrokenn.. sobb.. cryinn noww.. no one tu tokk to.. sobb.. ='(.. thee more eu feltt sorryy.. darr moree i feel sadd.. SOBB.. whyy muss heaven be sho cruell.. whyy muss darr world be sho cruell!!!!!!!!.. WHY MUS EU BE SHO CRUEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.. sobb... i cannortt standd it lerhh.. boutt to collapsee.. sobb.. sobb.. if i neva noee eu.. would thinggss be much much more better.. sobb.. oncee againn.. heartbrokenn......

wahh.. todaee mood verr verr good!!!!!!!!!!!!

2004-11-06T13:26:00.000-08:00

hahas.. lolz.. donno whyy todayy muaa moodd verr good.. kakass.. =D.. nortt lykke laz few dayyss.. sho moodyy.. heez.. hmm.. miee asoo donno whyy muaa moodd sho goodd.. kakass.. purely happiee.. bleahzz.. (=.. hmm.. havin a bad cough now.. *cough*.. sighh.. nvm butt verr stressedd narhh.. miee ishh darr orientation headd ferr nextt yearr orientationn marhh.. den haiyohh.. verr stressedd arhh.. lotsa thinggs tu do.. humpf!!.. cannortt restt.. cannortt sleep wholee dayy.. hahass... miee pigg marhh.. muzz habb enuff sleep orelsee darr nextt dayy gortt dark ringgs aroundd muaa eyess.. den bcumm panda lerhh.. hahas.. =P.. hmm.. noww muaa blogg gortt songg lerhh.. jay de jie kOu.. hehess.. nicee horr.. hahass... ishh kanggshengg help miee putt derhh.. muz thanks him norhh.. ah shengg arhh.. thanzz horr.. lolx.. =P.. bleahh.. hmmm.. toopidd kanggshengg everytym saee he verr taLL.. sae untill i verr shortt liddat.. humpf!!.. >.<.. lolx.. nvmm.. i ll groww tall derhh larhh.. =D.. hehee.. hmm.. sighh.. afterr finishedd writin muaa blogg.. stil muz go settle orientation thingyy.. sighh.. sir tan hab lotsa highh hopee on miee.. denn tt old womenn mdm kohh stil givin miee stress.. ahhh!!!.. sighh.. nvmm.. i ll do muaa verr bestt derhh!!!.. hehe... forr darr sakee of muaa darlinn st.johnn.. sT.john rox!!!.. kakasss.. bleahh.. haix.. noww savinn moneyy ferr graduation presentt.. denn muss buyy christmas presentt ferr tt toopidx boi.. denn muz save moneyy ferr muaa dreamm fonee.. panasonic x400.. hahasss.. muzz sav alot alott of moneyy nehh.. stil mus buy rO!!! sighh.. sianz arhh.. cannortt go takk neoprintt lerhh.. humpf!!.. nvm narhhh.. err.. 1 month 2 tyms can lerhh.. hees.. sighh.. havee tu go rushh muaa proposall outt lerhh.. gtg.. *cough* *cough* ...

("V")

2004-11-06T05:47:00.000-08:00

wo zhenn derhh hen xi huan ni!!!!!!!! hen xi huan!!!!!! hen xi huan!!!!!!!

sobb..

2004-11-05T16:14:00.000-08:00

sighh.. reallyy confusedd nehh.. sobb.. whyy cant i stopp lykinn himm.. whyy.. he ishh makinn miee more n more sadd.. sobb.. he ish unsuree of hiss feelins.. sho do i.. i am aso confusedd.. sobb.. whyy.. whyy mux reality be sho cruel?.. sobb.. do eu noee tt urr lil wordds can hurtz miee sho muchh.. butt.. i thinkk.. u woundn't understandd derhh.. i am suchh a failureee.. laz tymme ish lykke tiss.. now asoo.. i hate it... ahhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!.. i hate darr feelin of being heartbrokenn.. i hatee heartbreakers.. whyy muz eu break muaa heartt in million piecess.. whyy.. wo tao yen ni.. wo hen si ni lerh.. whyy aree u sho cruell.. sobb.. wat i wan ish lovee.. nortt pityy.. u understand marhh.. whyy mux i gett hurtt sho manyy tymmess.. whyy cantt i gortt overr eu.. whyy cantt i forgett everythingg boutt eu.. sobb.. i am hurtz..

lovinn a personn ish..

2004-11-04T06:00:00.000-08:00

sighh.. ai yii ge renn haoo xin ku.. especiallyy himm norhh.. =(.. sadd nehh.. sighh.. i realli lykke himm.. butt.. butt.. haix.. i don lykkee peoplee tu forcee miee tu do thingss thatt i don lykkee.. and u did tt.. wo zhen derhh bu xi huan zhe zhongg gan juee.. sighh.. butt stil lyke eu alott.. sighh.. realli lostt.. n confusedd.. sobxx.. andd wenn eu toldd miee tt *nEws*.. i wass sadd.. verr sadd.. butt i appearedd nothinn in frontt of eu.. sobxx.. it realli hurtz miee alott.. butt.. watt can i do ritee.. i cannortt controL eu.. or wat.. sobxx.. weepxx.. i realli donno watt to do now.. cann summonee tel miee wat tu do now?.. weepx.. zhen derhh.. xi huan ta hen xin ku.. hen xin ku.. i realli wan tu givee up.. butt.. muaa heartt jus don listenn tu miee.. ssobxx.. whyy ishh everythingg against miee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sobx.. ni xi huan wo ma.. sobxx.. i wished thatt i neva knoww eu.. neva eva.. butt.. everythingg ishh alreadyy fixedd.. we cant change anythingg......

todaee wentt tu chalett.. verr fun..(=

2004-11-03T06:14:00.000-08:00

hahas.. todaee wentt tu darr chalett butt neberr stayy overnitt.. butt stil verr fun.. wahh.. on darr wayy tu pasir riss verr far nehh.. hahas.. but worth it aniwaee.. we wentt tu darr chalett.. wahh.. saww feww half naked menn.. hahas.. zhijiee gim sengg wee leongg.. lols.. we wentt tu darr swimmin poOl and playedd.. wholee bodyy wett.. hahas.. denn we playy n playy.. atee cuP noodless.. triedd beer with sprit.. wahh.. nice sia.. hahas.. yUm.. den we playedd poker lorhh.. darr onee hu gortt darr smallestt cardd has tu drinkk one full cup of waterr nehh.. i drankk 13 cupss.. wanna diee liaox.. stomachh becumm big bigg.. `bloatedd.. hahass.. denn go rentt bicyclee withh zhijiee ah fu deyy all.. hahass.. we ride n ridee.. denn stopped at darr beachh.. waahh.. lookin at darr sea.. felt sho calm ferr tt moment.. thinkinn of him onli.. (=.. denn.. miee n wan yi shoutedd to darr biG sea.. hahas.. sho relax at tt momentt.. zhijiee caughtt a craB sia.. sho funniee.. lolx.. denn continuee tu ridee our bicycless.. we ridee tu pasir ris parkkk nehh.. wahh.. verr farr nehh.. butt funn.. denn we rodee backk n play play lorhh.. wah.. tyme realli passes fast.. sho fast 7 lerhh.. we wentt dere at bout 10 nehh.. hahass.. bu she de zou.. sighh.. butt stil leftt eventualli.. sighh.. realli had a fun dae.. miss al twO tenerx.. alott..

hahas.. tmloo goinn chalett lerhh..

2004-11-02T06:41:00.000-08:00

lolx.. tmlo goinn chalett nehh.. verr excitedd nehh.. lolxx.. hmm.. meetin shereenn deyy al at chua chu kangg controll stationn.. lolx.. 8.30 nehh.. lolx.. hahass.. veryy happiee.. lolx.. =D

(( sianz ]]

2004-11-01T16:44:00.000-08:00

ahhh.. very sianz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! cant stand it lerhh!!!.. miee sianz until wanna die lerh!!!

verr sian!! sighh`.. nothin to do nehh.. ratherr go skool denn stayin at home.. stonin.. ahh!! sighh`.. sianz sianz sianz.. noww stomachh verr hungryy.. nothinn to eatt at home.. sho patheticc.. sighh`.. yesterdayy ver funny nehh.. tt *bLur* kangshengg toldd miee he go buyy $24 worthh of ice cream.. and he tot was $4.. hahas.. lolx.. miee luff untill.. aiyoo.. cant stand it.. hahas.. hmmm.. sighh`.. todaee ourr class wentt ferr chalett.. miee neberr go.. shereen ruining sook ee ming zhu yap pipi aso neberr go.. we tmloo den go norhh.. lolx.. sianz arhh.. i wanna go out!! sighh`

hab i given up on lovee //

2004-11-01T06:49:00.000-08:00

sighh`// hav i givenn on love? sighh`..
lostt`
realli donno wat to do nehh.. miee actualli stil lykke himm derhh.. budden.. sighh`.. todaee he make miee angryy sho much.. humpf!.. >.<.. buddenn.. afterr tt okiess lerrhh larhh.. err.. todaee wentt to sook ee's hse ferr a swimm.. verr soonn.. rainin lerhh.. lykke shit!! humpf.. miee havenn playy enuff nehh.. todaaee verr sianzz.. noww tokinn on darr fonee withh gordonn.. he ishh havinn a big big stomachh pain.. sho poorr thingg.. sighh`.. hmm.. sighh`.. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH............i realli lykke tt guyy alott neh.. alot alott.. alot alott.. ishh tis jux a infactuation or crushh?.. i think norttx barhh.. realli HEN XI HUAN TA.. sighh`.. butt no chance derhh larhh.. sighh`... no mood.. sadisticc gall. [ wo zhen de zhen derh hen xi huan ni ]] cant stop thinkkinn of eu.. sighh`.. whyy mux i fall in lovee with ya?.. whyy.. i hav phobia ferr tis type of thingss lerhh.. whyy muxx i fall in lov AGAIN?..

cOnfu.sedd n lost.t

2004-10-29T18:47:00.000-07:00

eu mightt nortt noee ]]`
`[[ howw muchh i lovee eu
eu nevaa noee ]]`

issitt juxx a fairyy talee tt havenn beenn startedd ]]`

wo.hai.xiang.you.xi.huan.ni.lerhh /

butt i ll nevaa lett yew noee tt ]]`
nevaa ]]`
`[[ sighh

- whyy muxx i fall in lovee withh eu nehh -

todaee we noee ourr resultss lerhh.. streaminn resultss noee lerrhh \\

2004-10-29T07:12:00.000-07:00

sighh` todaee noee ourr resultss lerhh..sobxx.. sighh`.. nortt veryy satisfiedd with itt.. sighh`.. mie, pat yiqing n ming zhu wentt to darr samee klass.. shereen, sook ee n wanyi wentt to darr same klass.. sighh`.. deyy al wentt to verr good klass lorhh.. buddenn rui ning wentt to a verr *nortt* sho good klass.. sighh`.. den she cry n cry lorhh.. mie jux cannortt understandd norhh.. herr results sho goodd.. yett.. sighh.. sighh`.. everybodyy wan to cumm muaa class.. donno whyy.. especiallie hockk norhh.. cox al his fwenx in muaa class marrh.. lolss.. HAIXX.. myy darlinn yap yiqingg nortt in darr samee klass with mie!!!!!!!!! sobx!!! veryy sadd narh!!!.. shee ishh studyinn darr samee subjects n samee combination withh miee.. but suaysuay norhh.. nortx in darr same klas!! i ll miss muaa darlin derhs!!!.. sighh``.. and horr.. our klass gortt a few disgustin onee same klass wib miee.. EVEN MORE SUAY ARHX!!!!!!!!!!!.. disgustin freaks.. sighh`.. MOOD BADD BADD..

*to al muaa sisters*
sighh`.. although we differentt klasses.. butt horr.. we cannort forget eachh other kaess.. muxx foreva stayy as sisters horr.. =).. i ll miss u al derhh.. especialli muaa baobeiz!!!.. sighh`..

SOBX.. GONNA SEPARATE FROM TWO TENERX LERHH..

2004-10-28T05:29:00.000-07:00

SOBX.. twotenerx gonna separatee lerhss!!!!!!!!!! I DON WAN!!!!!!!!! WO BU YAO!!!!!! sobx.. realli verr sadd nehh.. =(.. mie realli don wan to separatee with muaa klass narrh.. sighh`.........

sighhh``

2004-10-28T05:15:00.000-07:00

sighh.. todaee i jux noee whichh klass i would be gtg into lerrhh.. sobx.. ish humanitiess klass.. sobxx.. onlii miee n ruiningg.. sighh`.. SOBX.. mie cryy n cryy lotsa ttyms todaee.. sighh`.. realli don wanna sepapratee fromm al muaa sisterss.. sobxx.. =(.. wo zhen derh bu yao!!!!!!!!!!..... sighh`.. afterr tt.. gortt muster paradee norhh.. denn hahas.. accompanyy huiyu to waitt ferr one nCC guyy.. lol.. denn played withh tommy's fonee.. sho funniee.. denn go eatt withh shereenn lorhh.. sighh` den wenntt homee.. no mood lerrhh..

sobxx.. two tenerx gonee..

2004-10-27T07:18:00.000-07:00

sobxx narhh.. days flies sho quickliee.. itz goin to darr endd of yearr lerrhh.. sobxx.. TWO TENERX GONNA SEPARATE SOON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I DON WAN!!!!!!!! i realli don wan norhh.. sobxx.. frm sec 1 til noww.. ourr klass have been verr unitedd.. we wentt thruu sec 2 campss.. and alott more.. we chase teachers awayy togetherr.. i realli don wan to promotee to sec 3.. sobb.. ='(.. howw i wishh timee can reversee.. shoo tt i can hab more tymm to cherishh everyone in 2/10.. =(.. sighh`.. regreted tt i neber cherishh every momentss we hadd.. sobxx.. sadd arhss.. i realli don wan to be separated fromm ourr klass.. butt.. i noe.. it is impossible derrhh.. regrets.................

[ hope al two tenerx can stayy in darr samee klass next year ]
// sho childish of mie to thinkk tis way

todaee wakeboardinn verr fun!!

2004-10-27T06:28:00.000-07:00

lolx.. wakeboardin verr fun!!.. hehex.. budden horx.. beforee we wentt wakeboardin.. wah laOx.. deyy donno giv watt toopid prizee.. hahas.. denn darr cherr anyhoww pull miee up go takk prize.. dots n dots.. lol.. denn wentt ferr wakeboardin.. verr FUN!! omg.. realli verr fun.. hahas.. miee, sook ee, ruining, ming zhu n muaa darlinn one groupp.. =P.. lol.. ourr boatt driverr haharr.. ver funniee.. wholee bodyy ishh tatoo.. lol.. we keepp li siao himm.. saee him unclee.. denn sook ee werntt down to darr water firstt.. denn ah ningg.. den mie of coz!!.. lol.. wahh.. wenn muaa turnn tt tymm.. miee verr scaredd nehh.. wahh.. denn haharr.. woree darr safetyy dono wat.. hahar.. denn haharr.. darr man passed mie darr ropee.. and denn aiyoxx.. donno howw to describee narhh.. indescribable feelin!! wenn its aboutt to pass muaa turnn to yiqing.. i gortt up darr boatt.. wah laox.. shortlyy afterr.. rainninn lerrh.. lol.. butt we still continued.. hehe.. lolls.. den wee jumped into darr water ferr a swimm.. wahh.. realli verr shuang nehh.. =D.. denn darr waves verr hugee.. hahas.. darr boatt boutt to capsized liddatt.. lolss.. veryy excitinn.. lol.. denn at tt tymm it wass raininn.. lol.. gortt thunderstorm.. buddenn.. hahaas.. very fun!!lol….. after tt we wentt homee lerrhh.. denn wentt back skool wihh a towel wrapped ardd miee.. =).. hock n jianrong sae verr funny.. issit.. gortt mehh.. aiyox.. donno larh.. hahar.. den horr.. i toldd gorodn over darr fonee.. haharr.. hee saee he gortt extraa ticketss to go wakeboardin.. lol.. he givinn miee.. =Pp.. happie~

sianz todaee.. butt.. hahas.. tmlo goinn wakee boardinn.. excitedd.. \

2004-10-26T05:37:00.000-07:00

haix.. todaee sho sianz.. ourr skooll gortx donno watt hobbiess daee.. sho borin nehh.. haharrx.. actuallie miee n wanyii signedd up ferr basketball.. buddenn in darr endd miee neberr go.. lol.. 8 of uss.. wentt to learnn howw to makee cheesee cakee norhh.. lol.. buddenn quitee sucessfull actuallie.. *hahas*.. miee pro marrh.. =Pp.. [ bHb ] nehh.. lol.. denn.. hmm.. wentt ferr tt toopid scrabble.. omG!!.. regrets.. lol.. denn wentt to lot1.. bla bla bla.. sighh`.. todaee sho sianz.. budden hahas.. tmlo goin wake boardin.. water sports.. at pungol.. lol.. sho happie n excited sia.. lol.. lookin forward to tmlo......

lol.. todaee shoo funniee..||

2004-10-25T01:57:00.000-07:00

hahas.. todaee wentt outt wibb yongshengg and caroll.. hahass.. wentt to juctionn 8.. we mixedd upp darr placee n tymm lerrh.. butt in darr endd.. stil foundd himm... lol.. denn afterr tt.. i kept on luffin n luffin fer no reasonn.. lol.. donno why nehh.. hahas.. i find it funnyy wen i thought ofe itt.. lol.. hmm.. denn wentt to takk neoprintss.. haha.. butt horr.. darr fotos verr darr clearr.. haha.. hmm.. andd walk walk heree n deree lorhh.. luffin al darr waee.. i thinkk yongshengg muxx havv thinkk tt ima crazyy.. hahas.. IMA NORTX.. lol.. den lata he gavee miee muaa birthdaee presentt.. den i gavee him his together wibb carol.. wahh.. miee birthdaee 4 oct neehh.. til noww stil gortt presents.. hehes.. =PpP.. hmm.. haha.. dennn wentt homee afterr tt....

haha.. sho longg neva luff untill siao lerrhh.. wishh i couldd putt all muaa troubless in a plasticc baggie.. denn.. throww awaee.. sighh`..

a true story taken frm friendster // mux read ]]-

2004-10-24T03:30:00.000-07:00

What is true love?
Is there any of such thing that is happening in this world that we are living in?
Is it so difficult to love and is it really that difficult to maintain a relationship?
For so many years, people kept asking me questions about BGR, and I always had the ready answers for them but when it is my turn to face a BGR problem, often I had no answer for myself. Throughout the years, I relentlessly read up on books for the soul and mind, hoping to search for the answer that is just for me. However, no matter how much books I read, I still couldn't find the answer. Until one day, when I finally met this girl, who was so sweet, beautiful, truly an angel to me. I kept on telling myself, no matter what, I must make this relationship turn out fruitful. She was those kind of girl that could make a good wife, I reckoned. We started off well, we chatted for months before we first met. It was a fine day, I decided to give her a surprise on our first meeting. I went to her house with a gift that she might like. I stood outside of her house, repeating the sentences that I am going to say to her, I was so so nervous. Suddenly, the door opened, right in front of me, it was her. I was shocked, I just looked at her and she was smiling to me. Before I could calm myself down and recite the speech that I had been practicing for the days, she said:" I had been waiting for you, I know you will come." I was so surprised, I didn't know that all along she was just standing by the window, waiting for me to come. It was a rather pleasant surprise, something that I never expect a girl will do. At that point of time, I felt that I am surely certain that she will be the one who is going to be with me for the rest of my life. I kept on telling myself that no matter what, I had to keep this relationship alive. For the next three months, everything went on smoothly. We had happy times together, though at times there are a few a arguements, but we were still happy to be together. Aonther three months past... the feelings that we shared slowly faded away, we had quarrels often, she was apathetic, didn't wish to do anything when there was a arguement. She might had felt that this was my wont to look for someone to argue. But I felt that it was not true. I never want it to be like this. As days passed by, we slowly lose contact and we seldom chat on the phone. I was lamenting over her, why didn't I do anything to stop this thing from happening? Did I mention that she was the girl that I really want? Am I too prideful that made me not trust her? Can I really do something to salvage our relationship? If in the first place, I had given in to her, will this thing ever happen?Finally, one day, I met this love gurl over the net. She gave me the following advice:" In a relationship, it always need two hands to clap, no one could survive alone in a relationship. Never think that you had given more than the other, as there is no limit in giving and taking. We should always put our loved ones in front of us and always think for them rather than for ourselves. Pride and ego do kill a relationship, swallow it and you will find that life will be much better. There is true love existing in this world, it will depend on how you look at it. Faith does play a big role. Believe in it, never let go something that you really think it's worth it. When it's gone, it will be gone... Always remember, believe in yourself, believe in the other party, together the both of you can pull through any obstacles that are in your way. For that I wish the both of you happily ever after..."I finally understand what is love. I went to look for her, I stood in front of the door. The door opened, and she said in a teary eyes:" I had been waiting for you, I am sorry for what had happened and for what I had did to u." I replied:" My dear, it was my fault, I should had trust you and give in to you. I promise that I wouldn't leave you again, I believe in you and I hope to be with you forever..." *True love does exist in this world. It's just a matter of how the both of you make it happen. Love the person with all you can, never ever let him/her down. There will definitely be a brighter future for the both of you. I wish everyone who is in love now to enjoy the best time and hope there will be an everlasting love for you*

:: sianz ::

2004-10-23T19:39:00.000-07:00

sighh`.. sianzz.. thinkin whether gortx to change muaa blogskinn marrhs.. sighh`.. sianzz.. nothinn to do.. noww waitinn ferr muaa maidd to buyy breakfastt backk ferr miee norhss.. haixx.. * hungry *.. =(.. sobx..

waitin ferr u..

2004-10-23T06:58:00.000-07:00

sighh` nothin to do.. sho writin muaa blog noww.. sigghh`.. reallii habb no confidence in lubb niaoxx.. a lil bitt aso dun havv.. sighh.. =(.. jux gave up on himm norhss.. coz i thinkk ferr him ishh onlii a crushh.. andd i gortxx phobiaa ferr boy gurl relationship tis typee of thingy liaoxx cozz haixx.. hurtx by one guy beforee and tt ishh darr first tym i realli lovee a boi narhss.. but.. haix.. don wish to tokk boutt it.. or even thinkk bout it norhss.. although don lykke tt guy liaox.. but darr thought of itt.. still maakess mie wanna cry.. sobx.. =(.. haixx.. noww realli no one in mind.. haixx.. waitin ferr mua truee lovee to cumm.. realli hopee sho.. mua fwenz alwaex sae " we gurls can live without man aso!! we nid nortx depend on man ferr survial !! ".. sighh`.. butt i thinkk tt.. no matter howw strong a gal ishh.. shee ll nid lovee and karee from darr guy shee loves.. realli.. =).. hmm.. i am waitin ferr summone who can realli treats mie verr good.. muz dotes lotsa on miee.. =).. butt.. dreamss neva cum truee.. haixx.. aniwaex.. i am nortx despO!!.. lolz.. haixx.. juxx waishh tt dere ll be summone deree ferr miee wen i am feelin down or lonely.. sho simplee.......

- mua wishh -

thumbs uP!!

2004-10-23T06:27:00.000-07:00

lolz.. todaee skoll gortx onee programme ferr sec 2s marrhs.. ish organised by thumbs up derhss.. hahass.. miee laz tym gortxx go ferr leadership campp anddenn gortzz to noexx thosee ppl frmm thumbs up larrhs.. hahass.. deyy were all verr outgoinn.. lolz.. saw lotsaa ppl.. and reallii hab fun todaee.. and i gortx to noee watt type of characterr i hav.. lolz.. =).. hmm from gap camp.. lolz.. alot.. and den eric julee were mua facilitatorss norhs.. hahas.. they are darr best!!.. lolz.. realli.. hmm.. eric verr handsome.. lolz..!!.. hahas.. and den gortx to noe mua personalityy worss.. lolz.. hmm..

- i loved beingg acceptedd and recognisedd -
-andd fearr of beingg rejected-.. oops!..
- i lovee to talk to ppll-
..- andd i ll be feelinn verr badd ife i do nortx hab summone to talk to -
.. [ izzit?!?!?!?! ] [ gortz mehs ??!!?!?! ]]..
- andenn verr optimisticx? -
.. - i lovee involvin alot of ppl in activities.. -
[ yarx lorhs.. darr more darr merrier ]..
- and its make mie happiex to c ppll happiex.. -
[ correct!! ]..
- and i find it easy to start a conversation.. -

hahas.. tiss ishh muaa chacracterr norhs.. *winkz*.. hahaas.. afterr tt wentt to takk neoprintz wib qingg lorhs.. den wentt to shereen's hse after a bath.. spent lotsa tym tokkin bout ghost storries.. wahh.. verr scaryy nehss.. den mie n shereen accompany sook ee to walk home norhss.. lolz.. chat ferr a long tym.. den gortx home coz mum naggin.. den writin mua bloggie heree.. hahas.. reallie hab a fun dae..

skippin saint john trainin failed \\

2004-10-22T03:46:00.000-07:00

sighh`

hmmm.. todaee gortz backk al muaa resultss.. sighh``.. donn saee lerr nahss.. haiyoo.. on darr wae to qing's hsee.. kena caughtt by sir tann.. haixx.. actuallie wannaa skipp saintt johnn derhss.. butt.. haixx.. caughtt by sirr tann at darr buss stopp.. suay arhx!!!.. haixx.. denn arguee wibb himm norhhss.. in darr endd.. i followedd himm backk.. haixx.. denn found outt tt paradee ishh cancelled.. machiam sia.. lolz.. hmm.. afterr tt.. haixx.. muaa seniorrss toldd miee.. dey verr disappointed wibb miee.. denn i verr sadd.. haixx.. i noexx.. deyy muz bee verr disappointed withh miee.. [ reallyy regreted skippinn saint johnn ]].. haixx.. afterr tt wentt to qing's hsee.. on darr waee.. mett wee leongg.. lolz.. =D... butt att darr thought wen deyy alreadie graduatedd realli beri sadd.. sobzz.. haixx.. denn tookk 175 to donno watt bus stopp.. i tot i lostt sia.. denn in darr endd still reached qing's hsee.. wan yi, qing, shereen waited ferr miee at darr bus stopp nearestt to qing's hsee ferr at least 1 hr.. hahass.. deyy tot i lostt.. lolz.. sho funnieee.. denn haixx.. wenntt homee.. hadd a littlee chatt on darr fonee wib gordonn lorhss.. denn i am here writin muaa bloggiee.. (^.')V.. hahas.. end here..

confusedd..

__ + . waitinferrmuaatruelovee ` :: starznolongershine :: confusedd lostt ] - regrets lykin u -

fail fail n fail //

2004-10-21T05:57:00.000-07:00

sighh.. todaee gortxx back al mua examss paperr exceptt ferr geo n d&t.. haiz.. disappointed.. failed mua science n maths.. sobxx.. cried lotsa tymz.. =(.. weepx.. haiz.. realli regreted laz minute studie.. sobz.. haixx.. nothin i cann do nowx.. sobz...

- hopeless -

science fail ]]`

2004-10-19T23:07:00.001-07:00

sighh``.. failed mua sceincee.. lykkee shitt sia.. machiam sia.. haixxx.. preparedd lerhsss... butt horxx.. ifwe mommieex noes horxx.. confirmm diee derhss.. sianzz arhss.. aniwaexx.. lax yearrr lerhss.. nothinn i cann doo marrhhss.. sighh``.. =(.. buddeenn hopee to goo darr samee klass withh muaa fwenxx norhss.. ^^.. winkss winkss.. wann yii noww besidee miee.. [[ rubbingg herr facee.. painn nehss..]].. lolxx.. hoppee otherr subjecttzz kee yii pass norhss.....

lovee nevaa failsss ]] `

after skool sho sianz.. went ice skatinn..

2004-10-19T05:23:00.000-07:00

sighh` todae after skool shoo sianzz.. sighh`.. qingg n ruii ningg wentt to darr moviess.. shereenn.. sookk ee.. qingg.. mingg zhuu went homee.. miee n wann yii sho sianxx.. sighh`.. wentt ice skatin withh gordonn.. hahass.. sho funnyy.. tt toopid boii push miee here n deree.. lykke shitt.. fell down lotsaa tymss.. butt horx.. wann yii verr kee liann.. fell downn.. and gorttxx bruise onn herr facee norhss.. sadd.. hmm.. wishh shee can recoverr quicklyy.. =).. hmm.. sighh`.. sianzz.. //

## donnoe ife still lykkee himm marrhss.. haixx.. impossiblee btw us derhss..nvm.. forgett itt... \

todae had funn!! wentt ice skattingg \

2004-10-18T02:51:00.002-07:00

=).. kakas.. todae gortx post exams activitiex.. hehex.. skoolll brought us out.. ferr ice skatting.. kakas.. we had lotsa fun todaee.. keke.. mie horx.. donno ice skating derhs although i wentt deree lotsaa tymxx lerhs.. hehex.. *bLushhh*.. hmm.. wahh.. mie shocked nehs.. mua classmates al verr pr0 sia.. kakas.. ken wei loong gordon ying and lotsa.. wahh.. - envy-.. kakas.. hmm.. although zhijie donno.. but he learn verr fast nehs.. hahas.. mi8e shoo lousies.. butt.. nvmm.. kakas... mua class mates gortz teachh mie.. (^.').. winkx.. kakas.. hmm.. wei loong verr helpfull.. teach miee all darr waex.. hahass.. gordonn aso norhs.. =).. verr good nahs.. til todaex i den realise gordon sho goodd derhs.. hahass.. ` no offence `.. kakas.. hmm.. ying aso.. she taught mie darr basicc too startt.. hahas.. =).. thanx horx.. hmm.. budden.. tym veerr shortt nehss.. jux den i noexx a how to skate a lit bit.. a lil onli arhs.. den kalai sae tymx uP.. kakas.. mie too slow lerhs.. hmmm.. den after tt.. hahas.. hmm.. 8 of us went to takeee neoprints.. kakas.. but haixx.. ying nortx dereee.. sadd... we took 2 tyms nehxx.. kakass.. after tt.. we went to qichang's hse ferr bowlin.. with.. jian rOng.. gordon.. ah fU.. Qichang norhs.. hahas.. but i onli stayed ferr a lil while.. coz mua mumm naggin norhss.. kakas.. mumx are al darr samee.. gtg.. buaixx..

sighh ` verr confused..

2004-10-18T02:43:00.000-07:00

sighh ` sobxx.. very confused noww.. i am nortxx sure whetherr i lykee himm mahss.. but.. haixx.. confused arhs!!!!.. sobxx... i noexx even ife i lykke himm.. deree ishh impossiblee betweenn uss derhss.. sobxx.. ='(.. saddenningg arhs.. realli wishh i could tokk to summonee now.. but.. sobxx.. sighh`.. shoo ishh betterr ife wee remains as fwenx.....

- confused //

exams arree finally overr.. ``

2004-10-14T17:02:00.000-07:00

kakass.. yeaa.. exams over lerhhs.. hahax.. err.. sighh.. past few daex sho stressed up.. finally can relax lerhs.. hahas.. can throww awaee bOokss lerhx.. kakas.. =Pp.. hmm.. hahas.. post exams activities cumin lerhs.. kakas.. =P.. we goin ice skatin.. kakas.. haixx.. itx gtg to be darr end of year soon.. soon.. we ll get separate from our fwenx.. sobx.. sobx.. realli don wish to.. sobx.. =(.. sighh.. nvm nahs.. anywae stil in same skool.. hehex.. stil can go out together.. ^.'.. err.. kakas.. cannortx write lerhs.. wanna go out lerhx.. heex.. buaix buaix..

+ Will I wait a lonely lifetime? If you want me to, I will `____________

perhapx`_____ lostlove \\

sobbs.

sobbs.

sighh~!

=(

ggees. =)

sobbs.

hhaiis.

sobbs.

=)

haiis.

boredd x(

siighh!

lyrriics meaningful.

hhaiis.

(=

iiff.

breakkiin down soonn.

sadd.

hees.

sobb.

sobbs

^^

haii.

farkk!

farkk!

sobbs.

ST.JOHNN SUX

("V")

hahass.

sobbs.

'-'

=(

sobbs!!

sobbs.

=(

sighh!

noww feelinn betterr..

**pheww**

SUCKORR BITCHH BIGG BOOBBS

wadd happenedd?

sho siann```

sobbs.. whyy ishhit sho hardd tu forgett eu.. forgett everythingg..

siann nehh.. haishh..

=Pp

cryin in darr harrtt

am i wrongg?

yay!!

hee..

u din noe tt u hurtt miee..

=(

yipee!!

haishh.. lovee? cann i trustt lovee?

shouldd i?

siann nehh.. sighh..

^(oO)^

haishh..

sobbin gal.. ='(..

todaee wentt tu muaa senior's housee..

^(oO)^

hee.. *bLurr pigg*

sighh.. lostt..

sighh.. sianzz..

lifee ishh sho meaningless

oops!

err.. sianzz..

(=.. better mood todaee lerhh..

once again, heartbroken..

sobxx!!!!!!!!!!!!

wahh.. todaee mood verr verr good!!!!!!!!!!!!

("V")

sobb..

lovinn a personn ish..

todaee wentt tu chalett.. verr fun..(=

hahas.. tmloo goinn chalett lerhh..

(( sianz ]]

hab i given up on lovee //

cOnfu.sedd n lost.t

todaee we noee ourr resultss lerhh.. streaminn resultss noee lerrhh \\

SOBX.. GONNA SEPARATE FROM TWO TENERX LERHH..

pheww

hee.. bLurr pigg